5566 is the best!

2012-02-02T21:53:00.000+08:00

男孩的出现
抚平了女孩心中的悲伤
让女孩死去的心再次复活
女孩希望
她和他
能像童话故事
拥有美好的结局。

我从来没有奢望过能拥有幸福
毕竟幸福从不属于我。
也许
这只是一场梦。
梦一旦结束
一切都会回到原点
但我不舍得醒来
不想醒来...

一直以来
我只希望能陪在你身边
看到你的笑容
看到你的眼神说着你很开心。
就算我是一个人
只要你好就好...

2012-01-23T01:24:00.000+08:00

爱情像是在冒险
不知未来如何
却还是决定陷进去
赌一把。
一次又一次地受伤
还是选择再试着相信
相信某一次会是对的人。

你说，
在做任何承诺之前
必须清楚地知道什么是永远。
那你对永远的定义是什么？
也许在你心里，
根本就没有永恒的爱情
所以从不对爱情付出。
这一次
希望你能对她好一点
好好地珍惜她...

你相信永远吗？
你的每一个承诺都让我开心却又害怕
害怕有一天
承诺会随着改变而消失。
害怕我们的爱情会有期限。
我们
会走到哪里？

2012-01-18T01:11:00.000+08:00

为什么不懂？
为什么哭泣？
为什么不管怎么努力结果还是一样的？
为什么好像做什么都是错的？
也许真的是我错了
也许我不够善解人意
也许我该更努力地去了解
也许我必须改变自己。
但我真的好累
好想离开
逃开这一切。

2012-01-04T23:43:00.000+08:00

恨会让爱有限制。

2011-12-27T01:52:00.000+08:00

如果有一天，
我消失了
会发生什么事？

如果有一天
我从此失去了笑容
那该怎么办？

如果有一天
我离开了
你会怎么做？

也许你说的对
我变了。
但你是最没资格说这句话的人

我
真的好累

2011-12-25T14:29:00.002+08:00

Ruin my mood first thing on Christmas Day

not that Christmas Day is anything big to me since i dont celebrate.

but still..

Seriously hate it when people dont believe in me.

I know what i am doing,

you are the one who dont know what i am facing.

Forget it if no one sees how hard i have been trying

working hard.

Everything is my fault okay?

I dont need your recognition anymore.

This is my life.

2011-12-22T21:17:00.001+08:00

我输了。

输给了自己。

每一次努力地往前走

最终还是失败了

而这一次

真的站不起来了。

老天爷，

你是不是和我一样

努力地微笑

但到了最后还是哭了？

如果泪水会有用完的一天

那剩下的会是什么？

失望

2011-09-01T23:26:00.002+08:00

人生

就是充满失望

然后渐渐绝望。

有谁，

经过多次的失望，

还能坚定地相信人性？

这一次，

我真的不知道

该如何面对你。

是继续相信，

还是完全放弃？

这一次，

我选择自己一个人面对。

一个人，

自己面对一切。

就算在黑夜里哭泣

就算必须强颜欢笑

就算我很累

也不再依赖任何人...

2011-06-24T00:14:00.002+08:00

是谁编制了我的人生？

老天爷，是你吗？

如果是你的话，

请你不要对我这么残忍好吗？

因为我也不知到自己还能撑多久...

泪水始终比微笑真实。

我的心好痛...

2011-06-12T23:06:00.002+08:00

心情沉重得像被捆住似的。

好想被泪水淹没

忘记所有的一切。

就如一张被人折过多次的纸，

每一个痕迹，

代表着我的悲伤，

而所有的痕迹，

都停留在那里。

像是惩罚一样，

那张纸，

越来越皱，

悲伤的痕迹也跟着增加了。

如果这是我的人生

那我该如何让这张纸

不再有痕迹？

2011-03-05T01:31:00.003+08:00

有时候，

我能够坚强地微笑

坚强地说，总有一天一定会成功的。

但有时候

我真的觉得好累。

不想走下去了。

常常问为什么

为什么世界要这么不公平？

为什么有些人，

伤害别人，作出可恶的事

却还是过得无忧无虑？

而有些人，

则是在生命里

不断地努力，

还是一无所有？

是命运吗？

如果今生的命运是因为前世所下的因，

那也是不公平。

因为我们无法控制，

却必须面对。

这个世界，

一点都不公平。

2011-02-21T01:31:00.002+08:00

原来

是我没有力气再坚强了...

我真的好累。

又软弱了，

还是从没坚强过？

却不能依靠任何人...

2011-02-20T00:19:00.002+08:00

why do i suddenly feel that the world rejoice

and i am feeling so alone.

the never ending problems,

WHICH NO ONE FREAKING UNDERSTANDS.

i cry

with only myself to console

i feel sad

but end up having to console others.

but does anyone know

that deep down i feel like crying hard

i feel like isolating myself

i feel like not bothering

i feel like hating the entire world.

i am also human.

i feel, so tired.

i feel like closing my eyes

and not bother about anything

i just need a break, seriously.

but i can never have one.

i am tired.

i really am.

2011-01-23T01:59:00.002+08:00

谢谢你曾在我的生命里出现
就算只有短暂的那一刻
就算你给我的幸福只限于那一秒
谢谢你
最少那一刻，
我能感受到你身体的温度
拥抱的温暖
说话时的温柔
胸中的心跳。
但最终
我们还是属于不同的世界
再见了，
我生命里的过客。

2010-10-16T01:01:00.002+08:00

突然觉得，
人生真的很像一场比赛。
有的时候，
我们充满了力气
一直往前跑。
但一旦所有的力都用完的时候，
脚步也开始渐渐地慢了下来。
好累好累，
甚至好想停下脚步。
然而
这场比赛，
时间不会暂停。
一旦停下脚步，
我们便落后。
这就是人生。
为什么要如此残忍？
为什么不能让我们有休息的空间？
我已经耗尽了所有的力气
现在的我，
是在无力地往前爬，
就算只向前一点点，
我也已经满足了。
我不想要求太多，
只愿能有足够的力气，
做完我应该做的事。
这个时候，
好希望你能在我身边。
就算是听到你的声音也好
就一下下......

2010-09-25T01:32:00.002+08:00

好辛苦。
真的很痛苦。

雨水从天落下来
狠狠地打在我身上。
一滴一滴的水珠，
淋湿了我的身体
也冷却了我的心。
每一滴雨水
就如尖锐的针，
刺进了我身体里的每一个细胞。
也许有一天，
当所有的细胞失去了生命时，
我也同时失去所有的感觉。
生命的美好，
是因为拥有感觉，不是吗？
但这些感觉让我好痛，
好痛......

2010-09-23T20:51:00.002+08:00

有谁能明白我心中的恐惧？
也许真的是我错了。
但我只能含着泪水，
继续走下去。

在这个世界上，
没有人能够将你从痛苦中走出来。
唯有自己。
如果我错了，
请你原谅我。
对不起。

我选择不再做梦，
因为梦只会带来不可能的希望。
我渴望的，
不会实现。

有时候，
真的好希望能有个肩膀
一个永远为我存在的肩膀
让我依靠。
但我知道，
这只是梦。
一场美丽但不属于我的梦。

我微笑，
因为我为我自己的坚强感到骄傲。
我落泪，
因为我的坚强需要休息一下。
就一下下，
让我闭上双眼
平静一下。

2010-08-31T23:44:00.002+08:00

悲伤。
黑夜的降临竟会让我有种悲伤的感觉。
我曾经相信的，
还能继续相信吗？
我曾经希望的，
还有希望吗？
是否人变了，
一切就不再一样？
是否世界的转动，
能让一切回到原点？
为什么一直锁定的目标
离我越来越远？
是因为我走得不够快，
还是我错了？
这世界没有答案。
只有自己的执著。

Stars

2010-08-31T00:34:00.001+08:00

累了，好想停下脚步，放慢我的人生。
当我抬起头时，
意外地看见耀眼闪亮的星星。
它无论在何时都努力地发出光芒。
只是人们偶尔才会望一望，
偶尔才会记得它的存在。
即使如此，它从没放弃过。
因为它知道，总有一天，
一定会有人珍惜它。
就靠着这个小小的希望，
就足够让它等待多年。

2010-07-02T23:23:00.003+08:00

望着你的背影离去，
我的心有种莫名的寂寞。
好想抓住那道梦想彩虹
而你，
是我的彩虹里其中一个颜色。
只有你在我身边，
彩虹才能完整。
但就算我就坐在你的身旁，
我们之间还是相隔千万公里。
因为两个人最遥远的距离，
是我就在你身边，
你却不知道我爱你。

梦想

2010-06-08T15:05:00.002+08:00

梦想。
每一个人都有梦想
也许现在，你还没找到它。
但我相信，
在每一个人的生命里
总会有一样你想珍惜，想拥有的那道彩虹。
在追寻梦想的途中，
我们一定会遇到种种的困难。
但只要心中有希望，
梦想，一定会实现。
而那道彩虹，
也会骄傲地为我们喝彩。

只要心中那道彩虹还在，
幸福，一定会出现。
只要一直向前走，
不管跌倒几次，
都要重新站起来，
继续追寻那道你想抓住的彩虹。
能不能拥有，
决定权在与你自己。

2010-05-14T20:47:00.002+08:00

一个人走在路上
抬起头，
那片灰暗的夜空
有着星星为它添上光彩。
有时候，
夜空的星星不在的时候，
夜空，会孤单吗？
星星，
会想念它吗？

对你最好的报复，
就是要活得比你更好。
但是这又谈何容易？
因为你在我心里留下的那道伤，
就算愈合了，也会有疤痕。
我相信，
总有一天，
我也会得到属于自己的幸福。
但在那之前，
让我努力将幸福带给其它人吧。

我不会再依赖任何人，
因为依赖会让我害怕，
让我失去安全感。

就让我继续做梦，
相信世界美好的梦。

2010-04-24T20:07:00.002+08:00

i realised,
that many things happen in a weird way.
family,
isnt that supposed to be the most warm place?
but yet,
its always taken for granted.
i love my family.
but i totally have no idea if they do.
why are we getting angry with each other over small matters?
why are we not caring for each other?
i dont know.
the only thing i know,
is that i am really very upset.
i may be very vulnerable.
maybe i cry too easily.
but thats because i care.
and thats why i am so upset.
maybe, you all dont even bother?

i realised,
and i hope ppl around me will understand
why am i so devoted to soka.
because they are always there.
because they are always so understanding.
because they always give me warmth.
i am very thankful
for TPSD is always there for me,
encouraging me.
i really appreciate that.
thanks, really from my heart.

school have just started
and for once i thought i will have more free time
but i am wrong.
i totally have no time
got into soka chorus,
being a district leader in my district,
being a CIC in TPSD,
being a main comm in friday dinner...
no efforts will be wasted.
i just hope that ppl around me will understand,
and support me.
my time table is horrible.
i got separated from my clique.
and the lecturers say: its an opportunity to get to know your coursemates better
oh well...
maybe?
i got super long breaks.
which i still dont know what to do yet.
earliest i end school at 7pm.
gosh.

i realised,
that many ppl are facing problems.
but i believe someday,
all of us will overcome it.
jia youus ppl!
i am striving hard too.

FO have ended,
and i am no longer running for HSSSC.
actually, i will miss them.
main com.
hopefully the next batch will do better
but i still love my main com.
i joined community service club.
but dont think i will be active.
anywayy, we shall see.

not long ago just got my kiwi coloured contact lens
not very obvious but its okay.
and i just got my hair extension purple colour.
haha.
i am starting to do weird stuffs eh?
think its quite boring to look the same and plain?
oh well..

tomorrow is my district discussion meeting.
but before that, i have soka chorus practice,
at jurong!
so after my choir, i have to rush to bedok.
going to be the emcee for my district discussion meeting.
nervous? i hope not.

when i think of my family,
i just feel sad.
and tired.
oh well..

2010-03-24T00:29:00.002+08:00

Today worked.
But weirdly, i am not that tired :X
Maybe cause today i slept in bahx.
i seldom have the luxury to sleep in ehh!
oh well.
Today was quite plain.
I woke up at around 1pm
(heh, meiwah waking at 1pm?!?!!)
yep!
then washed up, switched on my lappy
check mails and everything..
after that went to kajiao my brother,
he was applying for scholarship for uni :X
he got OMG results ROAR!!
yep, i looked through his WTH results and portfolio (what is it called? cant remember)
his academic achievements and CCA stuffs that file (tip of the tongue phenomenom :X)
anywayy, after that i went to practise singing =)
why?
cause i decided to join soka choir!!
going to have audition soon omgosh~!!
i scared of audition de ehh :X
but this time, i must get in!!!
i really want to join haha.
so i must practise more!! :D
then went to chant a while (no time),
and off to work!
lucky today on time just nice 5pm i clocked in :/
i am always late hahaha :X
then break out to eat,
and i forgot to break in!!!
when i clock out then realise never break in oh gosh.
nothing serious, i hope?
then go home.
made some mistakes in front of my boss :(

yesterday was fun!
i met aaron and samuel at 10am (they were late AHEM)
to discuss the FO stuffs.
then 12pm HSSSC informal meeting..
informal meetings are never productive i guess?
haha.
after that we went to carls jr (they suggested cause i have staff discount)
for lunch.
casey went off to play badminton with his frens (always PS us de!!! *sobs*)
haha main comm having lunch together!!
we should have more of this outings!!
Me, sam, aaron, zyndie and jon went together
all ate portobello mushroom burger except jon chose famous star
haha.
me and zyndie ate until too full.
and we played true or dare in carls jr!!
with zyndie's itouch
haha.
i didnt know there is such thing in itunes store!!
the itouch's dare is scary la!!
i kena all the weird stuffs!!!
1. have to rub my nose with the nose of the person left side of me = samuel
(please dont think so much we are just partners in FO! and i wont fall in love with annoying orange!)
2. spin (something) and kiss the person it points to = aaron [de hand k not anywhere else]
(please dont think so much we are just fellow HSSSC mates!!)
3. kneel on one knee and kiss the hand of the person opposite me = Zyndie (phew~)
4. make a moustache out of paper (tissue) and put on for the rest of the game (OMG? so long?)
5. hop on the spot for 30 seconds (i still have my moustache on!!)
hahaha. others not that bad lahx so dont really remember :/
the me last time will never choose "dare" in the fear of embarrassing myself.
but i have changed.
find that "true" is very boring cause i have no secrets anywayy.
so i keep choosing "dare" even though i keep having to do weird and OMG stuffs.
ooohh and JON!!!
dont forget to remove a part of your clothing during our meeting k!! :X
haha.
Zyndie had one very cute "dare"
[wave to a person until he/she waves back]
she chose my boss :X
hahaha.
today when i work, my boss said:
Boss: whoax yesterday treat your frens to eat arh!
Me: no ehh, they pay themselves :X
Boss: next time ask more frens to come!! but dont be so noisy. you all dont feel ashamed arh?
Me: nopez we dont :D
Boss: i actually wanted to go over and ask you all to lower down your volume
Me: orh.
Boss: when i do cashier i cant hear the customer talking
Me: hah got so loud arh?
Boss: you do before you should know mah.
Me: ehh? ooops :X

anywayy, after the lunch, me and sam accompanied zyndie
to hunt for her D&D clothes.
i didnt go cause too ex.
entrance fee $50 !!!
plus still need buy neon clothes.
she managed to find one which suits her!!
i think she wear anything also nice la.
haha.

after that went TPSD O&G meeting for discussion.
this time, i got a more slacking role.
SOUVENIR COMM!!!
muahahahaha!
got nice and interesting ideas discussed with dillon :D
then we went for dinner :)
i only ate dessert cause was still too full.
dont blame me k!
imagine eating CARLS JR!!!
ROAR!

tml going to gavin's house with The Addicts
they going to play PS2
but actually i dont play PS2 ehhh...
haha.
everytime gavin plans something, it doesnt work.
this time finally successful!!
BUT!
it was planned by sarah so not counted!!
muaahahaha!! XD
at night got soka meeting =)

happy to know that my frens are happy
even if my presence in their world are fading away
at least, i know they are going on well =)
hope that they will always be happy :)
MUST BE OK!! ^^

time does not kill true love.
because true love always remain in the heart.
even if they may be far apart..
But if just one heart fails to remain true,
then the connection will be lost into,
nothing but sorrow and pitiful..

oh well~
i shall go chant and go sleep lerh!
tml meeting The Addicts at 11am at BISHAN!!
yep hahahaha.
cya! =)

2010-03-15T21:30:00.002+08:00

有时候，
你努力地往前走
不知不觉忽略了许多。
紧盯着目标，
害怕一旦移开视线
自己会开始摇摆不定。
但就因如此，
周围的景色却像隐形的空气一样
从世界里消失。
有一天，
当你突然发现自己失去了很多时，
却已经挽回不了了。

值得吗？
应该难过吗？
一直说服自己，
过去已成无法改变的事实。
原来
很多我以为属于自己的
其实转眼就消失。
那就算了吧。

Recently dunno why
really VERY tired.
No matter what i do, i feel so tired.
Work, SYM, FOC...
Is it really my energy all used up?
Or is it just my life condition is low?
I really need a break..

Work have been quite alright actually.
always get the kitchen stations.
but good also, i practise making the burgers and stuffs.
cause i am forgetting everything already.
haha.
last friday when working,
carls jr blacked out 5 times!
i fry half way black out ehh...
and chop meat half way...
then can hear the chopping meat sound in the silence.
then my boss say:
"like that also can chop meat arh?"
haha.
seems like carls jr left with a few employees le.
most left already..
didnt work alot,
but feel so tired of working...
thinking of quitting, but might not?
only know that when school starts,
most probably wont work le...

SYM!!!
SSA YOUTH MUSICAL!!
i am helping as the backstage crew,
helping the casts make up.
i have to admit,
i am horrible when it comes to arts.
Till now still not good at it.
but still ok lahx...
haha
I watched when they having rehearsals,
chant with them.
And saw the amount of effort they put into this musical.
Really admirable and courageous!! :)
A huge applause!!!
They really did so much,
for kosen rufu,
for sensei...
there are a total of 18 shows,
imagine how tired they will be.
And many are fighting sansho shima.
They will definitely break through and create victories in their lives!! :)
I watched the mandarin one with my mum on sunday.
and felt happy after watching it.
I believe,
they have touched the audience,
with their spirit.
The mentor and disciple spirit.
12 shows left.
Jia youus ppl!!! :D
And the theme song,
is really nice.
Thanks, for composing such a nice and touching song.
I am grateful to you for your contributions,
no matter what happened in the past...

FOC!
yep its here!
as the HSSSC main com,
i have to be involved in it.
And as the logistics IC with sam,
its tiring, but we create memories along the way.
will really miss this main comm.
Truthfully,
i didnt like them in the past.
but now, i love them!!!
they are really like a family.
Maybe because last time we are working on individual projects,
but now we have the same objective - FOC
FOTC was on the 9 and 10th of march.
it was ok...
now we shall move on to FOC,
and make improvements! :)
yes, HSSSC!
LETS DO IT!!! ^^

recently have been thinking...
what should i do for next AY?
decided to stop work,
not going to run for HSSSC...
so i dropped 2 commitments.
thinking of joining Soka choir!
dunno why suddenly have the thought.
and...
my mum supports me fully!!
haha.
i was so surprised.
i told her about my intention of joining,
and she excitedly supported it.
but i am scared of auditions...
later fail how?? :(
oh well~
shall just go for it?
but now i have to go find out how to join first.
haha.

GAHHHH~~~
i want a "no life" life!!!

2010-03-04T17:13:00.002+08:00

Sometimes,
when we take time out to look back into the past,
a sudden wave of saddness will come.
Remember when we used to be so happy together,
remember when we used to laugh,
to cry, to complain, to talk about our aspirations,
to say that we will be friends forever.
But when time really passes,
when we are thrown into different worlds,
everything is smashed.
Time,
can kill friendships, relationships.
They are like the sea,
washing away what we drew on the sand.
Someday,
there will be nothing left.
Time,
can heal wounds.
To wash away the memories that is valued only by me.

Horoscope says that its time for me to let go of the past.
I guess so too.
But what is the point of letting go of the past?
What will happen if i do so?
No matter what i do,
everything seems so wrong.
Ignorance is a bliss.
I have to agree this time.
Why are you wanting me to believe?
When reality says the opposite.

Sometimes,
when it gets too cold,
even the blanket cannot give me warmth.
Sometimes,
when it gets too tiring,
even sleep cannot give me strength.
Sometimes,
when it gets too pointless,
even explanations cannot give me motivation.

I am just tired,
physically
mentally
spiritually...

2010-02-13T13:27:00.001+08:00

走在熟悉的路上，
我往回家的路走去。
记得两年前的夜晚，
曾经和你一起在公园里
两人在月光下聊天。
当年
不懂事的我，
不懂得珍惜一切。
我们的友谊，
总是被我当成理所当然。
当时
一直不肯承认友情对我的重要性
因为
害怕失去
所以不敢拥有。
我想跟你说，
谢谢你。
谢谢你当我那么特别的朋友。
如今
你不再我的身边
每当夜晚回家时，
走过曾经与你共同的回忆
我不禁会想起
当年我们拥有彼此的那段时光。
希望你会幸福快乐。

如果有一天
你发觉曾经爱过的人
对你说的话，
对你做的一切，
都是建在他的虚伪上，
你会怎么做?
那段你以为对彼此重要的爱情，
其实只有自己回忆，
应该遗忘吗?

温岚 - 傻瓜
"傻瓜我们都一样
被爱情伤了又伤
相信这个他不一样
却又再一次受伤

傻瓜我们都一样
受了伤却不投降
相信付出会有代价
代价只是一句傻瓜"

夜晚的天空
只有星星作伴。
夜空，
会孤单吗?
会希望有温暖的棉被陪你入睡吗?
在那宁静的夜晚
我走过球场边的游乐场，
回忆渐渐浮现在脑里。
游乐场依然没变
但时光流逝，
人，
变了。
月光下，
泪水兴奋地涌出眼眶。
看着周围单纯的孩子
快乐的奔跑、玩乐，
我好希望，
他们能快乐幸福地成长。

有时候，
好希望时间能停止
让我安静的休息。
但时间就是如此残忍，
非要我面对一切，
要我学会坚强。

音乐的旋律
在耳边响起。
像是有人为我弹奏。
也许这就是所有音乐人的想法
相让孤单的人感动，
让流泪的人
嘴角稍微扬起。

Yesterday went back to Damai
saw many juniors.
and realised, we are getting old!!!
omg~
went to see how is choir going,
really proud to see that they have improved!!
they sing louder and better le
but still need improvements!!
yep yep!
choir jia youus! :)
modern dance also not bad!
got new style le =)
haha.

this chinese new year arh..
need to study
siansation!!
oh well~
hopefully can do well in my exams.

nothing to blog liao
bye bye!

2009-12-24T00:03:00.003+08:00

我喜欢这样望出窗外
看着景物匆匆而过。
夜里，
街上的灯乖乖地配合来往的车子
画成一幅美丽的图画。
五彩缤纷的灯，
在黑夜里显得更加迷人。

想起我们曾经走在街上
总是聊得忘了时间的存在
方佛全世界都祝福着我们。
然而
计划仍赶不上变化，
就在那一瞬间
我们成了两个陌生人。
至今，
发呆时还是会闪过同样的问题:
你对我，可曾真心爱过?

在心里被锋利的刀狠狠地刺伤时，
我却只有无奈。
也许是上天嘲笑我傻，
才会接二连三地使我的心滴血。

寒冷天气，
就连棉被也无法给予足够的温暖。
记得你曾说过，
会在我冷的时候紧握着我的手。
但你已不在。
你的世界，
再也没有我的容身之处了。

我... 并不后悔。

2009-12-20T00:40:00.002+08:00

DISAPPOINTED.

With myself.
With my friends
With...

Term tests haven been very good
Sick for almost 1 month
And i killed my own lappy
Been very emotional
Disappointed with friends
But most disappointed with myself
Family stuffs to face
Many things crashing

我嘲笑生命
嘲笑它总是让人哭泣
我嘲笑自己
嘲笑我总是让自己流泪
我嘲笑时间
嘲笑它总是如此迫不及待

我脸上的微笑
如果有一天
就这么消失了，
而泪水却坚持代班
那我就由它吧
因为微笑也需要休息。

2009-12-07T15:07:00.003+08:00

你要走了
一步一步的距离
我愣在那里
望着越变越小的身影
那曾经很熟悉的背影
现在只剩遥远的距离。
也许是我太傻
相信从未存在的一切
其实只有自己记得的回忆
毫无意义...

2009-11-28T22:42:00.002+08:00

WOW
Lecturers and tutors really aren't merciful people.
We finished one and zillions come.
No ending work.
Though its mind torturing to have to read so many journal articles,
i would say i find this semester's studies more interesting.
Just completed lit review sometime ago,
and now bombed with INTRO and Percog assignment 1.
ah well~

Recovering from a terrible sickness
no idea why i got sick
suddenly felt horrible and TADA- FEVER!
yes but now left flu and bad cough only no worries
thinking abt it,
i am quite pro ehh.
yesterday still can work =X
and tml working again =/
yesterday swensens
tml carls jr
hahahaha.
Yes i try to take care of myself
Nagged by the Addict Society
and Justin
thanks.

Anywayy
i really dunno
i think i am wrong
but she isnt right either.
how?
Or is it,
my prejudiced judgement towards relationships?
who can tell me
am i overboard by saying that?
but what i said to her is true.
sigh...

No idea why am i feeling so down when i think abt it
maybe cause i am sick bahx --> vulnerability
who knows?
no one will.

Justin,
thanks for caring.
but i really gave up le.
i just want to pursue my career, and my interests.
i believe someday,
you will meet a good girl who truly loves you =)
till then, be strong!
and,
i might consider not quitting swensens =X
haha

all the places which i wanna go these few days
all never go
i wanna go soka bookfair
Sitex
both never go
reason : LAZY
Sitex is ok i guess
can go next time meanwhile save money
anywayy its not any cheaper.
SSA bookfair
maybe i will try to slot a time to go tml before or after work
haha
which means
today must finish my ASSIGNMENTS!
GAhh
Term tests are coming!
=X haven started at all

ohh well~

2009-11-22T19:45:00.005+08:00

I do feel emo-ish when it comes to frens.
somehow i am really confused.
I have to say,
time does separate people.
Even those friends whom you think you were so close with.
They might leave you for others.
I wanted to believe my frens are still there.
but somehow,
it just isnt convincing.
because of that,
i shut myself off.
but i apologize to you, angie
its not that i no longer treasure frenship.
its not that i no longer think that frens can bring happiness
its not that i dont feel anything from what frens bring to me.
i am tired, you know
because of all the things i have to face.
somehow when i need them,
they are not there.
and when all my commitments come
and i am so busy,
everyone will see it as i am the one who is too busy for my frens.
yeahh i do agree most of the times i am too busy
but do you know, there is a reason for it?
how many of you support me?
i am so sorry

2009-11-15T09:11:00.002+08:00

wooots~!
here i am blogging again!
recently busy with assignments,
projects, SDLs, online quizzes,
TPSD friday dinner,
TMC youth outing,
TPSD institution meeting,
work, HSSSC....
hmm, its as usual lahx.

Friday dinner 2 days ago was great.
All along i was rather disappointed by the attendance.
Though friday dinner 2 days ago was worse in the attendance,
but everyone was relaxed and had fun with the TemaPoly.
and i realised that i am really fortunate.
It was lucky that my Physiological Psych tutor is a funny and lame person.
He cracked lame jokes and 欠扁问答题.
During the TemaPoly game,
me and yun hui ran out of questions.
and so, i remembered the 欠扁问答题 my tutor played with us,
and throw the questions to the members who came.
it was great fun.
the attendance was very little but because of that,
everyone had the chance to play it.
i am really happy and touched.
i really really want friday dinner to be a success.

TPSD institution meeting is back again!
this time, due to all my commitments,
i had really little time for this.
but i really want to do it well.
so i need TIME MANAGEMENT!
yep
TPSD November instituition meeting MUST be a success!

Yesterday night was TMC youth outing
i invited sin ying hui ting sarah jun rong taizheng-gor and jaf
it was quite alright except ...
apologies to sinying hui ting and sarah...
gomenasai!!
hmm...i ate quite alot.
haha...getting fat omgosh sinful!!!

my life like nothing much also arh
always same content hahaha
no inspiration to blog in chinese
and i realised my chinese really CMI already
~.~

All the best to those who are struggling and working hard!
=)

2009-11-04T16:41:00.003+08:00

Somehow unknowingly i have accepted some facts
i guess its ok already bahx.
sometimes the difficult part is accepting
once you have accepted the fact,
everything will be better.

my life is really hectic
studies, projects and tests are coming up
soka, TPSD friday dinner TMC youth outing and TPSD instit mtg
Work, i am working once a week
HSSSC, the activities are coming up
almost everyday after school i have meeting
weekends one of them taken up by work
the other most of the time got meeting
but i am alright.

Realised how my comrades are so supportive
thank you everyone!
for being there for me =)
i have met true comrades ^^
love love~~
gakkai is a warm family, really.

and once again,
thanks sinying sarah and hui ting
for nagging at me to go for my hospital appointment
and francis for threatening me =S
hahaha.
=X

physically i am tired.
but mentally, it feels great
to strive with all my comrades
with the same goal in mind
unity!

mabel,
i know you are aiming for a 4.0
all the best k!
jia you jia you~~

today's hospital appointment is so cute
the doctor said to increase the dosage
in the end, the nurse never go write
then she told me "no medicine"
and the doctor say see him again 3 months later
the nurse say 2 months
heh was she listening? =0
anywayy, in the end i didnt get medicine hahahaha

suddenly got nothing to post le
so thats all for today!
=D

2009-10-31T23:12:00.002+08:00

为什么
最近的心情这么沉重
能不能请你不要说话?
给我一点时间可以吗?
能不能不要管我?
我倦了
为什么我这一切的努力
换来的却是别人的不谅解?
真的很想逃避
离开这种种。
原来
要原谅一个伤害过你的人
是多么的困难。
好不容易，
我以为自己最少恢复了一点的精力
却又被别人说的话击倒。
所以，
你能不能不要管我的事?
让我休息一下，
可以吗?
就连朋友也疏远
我
是注定要面对这一切的

2009-10-23T21:40:00.004+08:00

BLAH BLAH BLAH~~~

SCHOOL HAVE STARTED WOOHOO!!!!

heh..yep
end of holidays so fast right?
GRR
I am so lucky!
No lectures at all for my CDS haha
but i didnt get into my first choice
ahh well~ its ok
anywayy
lessons have been alright for me
just that,
as usual,
i fall asleep during lectures =X
heh not purposely de k =S

Today,
i saw him again.
Past the library,
and he past the triangular garden
so many times i see him today
I guess jaf must be feeling irritated by me already
ohh well.

Had been watch KO 3an Guo
until epi 34 alr
now waiting for the new epi to come out hahaha
HAO SHUAI ARH~!!!
its funny and sad and err all the feelings you can get
and the songs damn nice haha.

Today the first TPSD Friday Dinner have kicked off
Well, not too bad
but the attendance makes me sad
its ok.
surely it will increase!!
YES IT WILL!!!!

Phew~
so many things to do.
got a list of things to do
10 things to do...
lazy to start heh

i feel that the distance between me and my frens are getting so big
that maybe, we cant feel each other anymore.
why do i feel that i have lost them?

you are the source of happiness from all my unhappiness
please let it stay that way.

你听见了吗?
那颗为你而跳动的心跳
只想这样默默地看着你...

2009-10-17T01:25:00.002+08:00

HOHOHOHOHO~!!!!
I CUT MY HAIR!!!
finally haha.
I never cut for half a year already.
Cant bear to cut my hair...
Well,
yep
finally cut it.
Though didnt change the hairstyle much,
but i still like it.
The hairstylist was SUPER patient.
until i almost fall asleep haha.
That salon have never let me down.
Thanks mabel for intro-ing me that salon.
Though not cheap arh...
I chose to cut my hair this month,
cause its my bday month haha
got more discount for members =X
after discount, $16 ~.~
considered cheap for the salon haha
Anywayy~~
yeah i like the feeling after the haircut.
forgot to ask for his name,
next time can 指定 him to help me cut.
but now i also dont care haha
lazy to 指定 already.
as long as cut nice can le hahaha.
i think sometime later
it'll be time to dye my hair again =X
no worries my mother dye hair very pro derh.
hahahaha

sigh.
this is weird...
object yet support?
isnt that equals to not supporting?
anywayy,
i will hold on.
it is alright...

Feeling super emo nowadays
i think i cannot stop working arh.
must have something to do then can arh...
not used to feeling so free
after such a long time of packed and hectic life.
this week feels so weird.
but anywayy,
school going to start soon!
the timetable is...............ok la
CDS made it end so late =(
monday and wed end at 7 pm!
every monday have TPSD friday dinner planning at 7.30pm
no dinner =( can save money hahahaha.

Oh yes,
i was saying,
feeling super emo recently.
well,
i think the show and songs too emo liao.
the feeling is like ....cant breathe de
serious sia.
hahaz.
music is really powerful..

this week though never work,
almost everyday got soka meeting
ya arh,
why so many =X
monday night: TPSD friday dinner main comm meeting
tuesday night: District 2 meeting for updates
wednesday night: TPSD friday dinner main comm meeting
Friday night: TPSD CIC study meeting
saturday: afternoon CIC meeting, night Youth IgNite conert
Sunday afternoon: Individual Zone discussion meeting
phew~~
it feels as if i have joined soka for a long time...
but actually,
i haven even joined for a year yet.

HSSSC...
sometimes i dont know how to face it actually.
it definately isnt easy to work in a group.
oh well~ half a year more.
after that,
i will concentrate and focus on soka already.
still, i learnt alot in HSSSC =)

THANKS MY FRENS
Mabel, KoonHiang, Jaf, and Jun Rong
for celebrating my belated bday on wednesday
heh heh
got loopholes arh mabel...
=X
still, i am happy thanks ^^
and thanks for the ang pow!
Thanks to:
KarKoon (biggest shareholder) * 大股东*
Mabel
Koon Hiang
Jaf
Jun Rong
=D
and thanks koon hiang for the prezzie heez

to think that even as a fren,
you didnt wish me a happy birthday..
whatever excuses wont work
now,
i dont even want to regard you as my fren.
but you are my comrade,
i cant change this fact.
i dont even want to remember anything already
just treat it as i dont know you.

2009-10-15T17:31:00.002+08:00

不知为什么
最近总觉得心里被一层莫名的悲伤包围
使我好想逃避，
无力面对。
一边的我，
好想勇往直前，
努力改变这一切，
证明自己。
但
另一边的我，
只想像以前一样
过着简单空缺的生活。
因为累了吗?
因为累的时候，
也会希望能有人在身边吗?
但我知道
这一切只不过是生命开的玩笑。
当泪水在阳光下落下时，
最少
它会反射亮光。
在黑暗里，
它却只有空气作伴。
在这个辽阔的世界，
我们追求的种种，
最终，会变成什么呢?
没有希望，
就不会失望。
但没有希望，
人要怎么活下去?
一丝的希望，
也许真能改变很多事吧。

2009-10-10T02:45:00.004+08:00

I realised,
that many ppl are facing alot of problems.
i have my own too.
but i cant only bother about mine.
i need, and want to help the others.
i dont want to be useless to their problems...

i am glad that they tell me their problems.
at least i know,
i am someone.
but thats not the point la haha
i really hope everyone can overcome their problems.
for now,
the only thing i can do,
is to be by their side,
listen to what they have to say,
and support them, encourage them.
whether they can overcome it or not,
its still up to them.
but i strongly believe in them!

sometimes i rather all their problems fall on me
this way my frens wont have to face any problems.
but thats the wrong thinking i know..
i really want them to be happy...
what should i do?

5th October- MY BIRTHDAY

2009-10-06T00:00:00.004+08:00

5th October:
Today is a special day for me.
It is my birthday!
Happy birthday meiwah!
hahah
I chanted to start off my birthday at 12 am
and received a message from Huifang.
So touched!
She actually stayed up just to wish me happy birthday.
haha love you!!!

Then i was bombarded with birthday wishes.
Really fortunate to receive so many birthday wishes.
I went to meet Angie, to eat ice cream haha
then we went shopping and i bought a jacket, a watch,
and a shirt for my brother.
Angie went to buy a dress for her JC 1 dash
NOTE: ANGIE BUY DRESS !!
hahaha.

after that i went to school
need to submit the receipts for the Magical Autumn event.
meet jaf and we went to makan at Mind Cafe
which happened MABEL WAS THERE!!
with her classmates playing.
haha Singapore too small la haiyoz.
yep
and thanks mabel's classmates for singing bday song to me hahaha
it was unexpected.

After that, i went to TSC ( which is super near )
reached at 7.16pm
and started chanting until 9pm.
ITS WAS AWESOME!
I set my resolutions and vow to the gohozon,
that i must achieve them by my next birthday,
and also chanted for new frens, and our PGRs.
A breakthrough! ( first time i chanted 1h45min in one shot )
hahaha.
after that, shi ling (my zone leader)
had a dialogue with me. taught me many things.
and~~
A birthday surprise by my TPSD comrades!
They popped out a bday cake out of nowhere
(they are good at hiding it i didnt suspect anything)
and sang bday song, cut cakes made wishes, take pictures.
I have attended many ppl's bday celebrations.
But this is the first time,
i have my very own birthday cake,
i made birthday wishes,
i blew the candles
and i cut the cake.
First time,
it was my birthday celebration.
THANKS =)

This year's birthday is definately different.
This time, i am truly happy.
because of soka, TPSD,
because i have mission to accomplish,
i have challenges to take on.
I have wishes to fulfil.
I am happy,
because i spent a wonderful day today
chanting, having dialogue.
My life have changed, so have my birthday.
Thanks everyone!

i realised, its all these small happiness that makes one so fortunate.
I have soka frens, sec school frens, poly frens,
my beloved Gor and Jie, etc.
i have so many ppl around me.
As long as one is happy,
everyday is their birthday.
But if one isnt happy,
even the birthday seems so dark.
I want my everyday to be like my birthday.
I want ppl around me to be happy.

Thanks for appearing in school today.
I am happy to see you.
Even if you dont know.. =)
All the best, and bye..

2009-10-04T00:04:00.002+08:00

Today's tuition was cancelled.
Its a good thing because finally i get some rest.
haha.

Allan, i am really sorry
Not that i really want to quit or purposely want to work less
But i am seriously tired.
I will try my best to work derhx..
I have decided not to quit.
which means i will still continue 3 jobs
just that it will be lesser working time.

Gina, i am so disappointed and upset.
Why didnt you come when you said you will?
What is it that made you leave gakkai and drop faith?
No matter what,
i will not give up on you.
I will lead you back to faith,
based on daimoku.
I strongly believe.

I came to realise that if smth benefits us,
most likely it wont be the best for others.
How to make it a mutual benefit?
Its tough.
And i chose the most difficult path,
as always, i am so weird.

recently been through all the lethargy
and problems,
i realised i have gained more experience.
i have grown.
as long as i base my life on faith,
everything will be alright.
even if the path is tough and tiring,
i know everything will turn out well.
so i cannot give up.
jia youus!
ganbatte! =)

through talking to justin and wei kang,
i realised why i made myself so busy already.
sometimes we made decision due to our unconscious desires.
and we thought they are instincts.
i joined soka, hsssc, went to work in carls even when i still have swensens,
and still teach tuition.
all because i wanted to gain more experience,
because of my love for maths,
because i want to create values in my life.
because i want to lead my life meaningfully.
because i want to do things i like.
and all these small reasons,
resulted in me having so many commitments.
but i am thankful.
because through all these,
i have learnt so much,
gained valuable experiences =)

cheers! ^^

2009-10-02T10:07:00.002+08:00

男孩以温柔的口吻，
对眼前的女孩说话。
男孩不知道，
其实女孩的心已有不正常的心跳。
就算周围都挤满了人，
只要男孩还在女孩的视线内，
无论他在人群里的哪个角落，
女孩都能轻易地看到他。
因为在女孩的眼中，
男孩显得最耀眼。
然而，
她只是一个普通的女孩。
他，不可能会发现她的存在....

2009-09-30T22:23:00.003+08:00

hahaha blogging again~!
so tired.
Today worked at swensens,
then me and Liew Yung went walking around
and poor Liew Yung kept getting whacked by me =D
muahahahaha!!! XD
(Jovin dont think far far k)
anywayy,
really thanks alot, Liew Yung.
Thanks for being my friend. =)

I think many JCs are having their promos now.
ALL THE BEST MY DEAR ANGIE!!!
i believe you can do it! hugs

I'm seriously getting a headache facing them.
Do i always let guys feel that i like them? =O
SERIOUSLY OMGOSH.

忘记一个人最好的办法就是爱上另一个人。
可是，
倘若心里已经有一个人的存在，
那爱上另一个人可能吗?
我喜欢你。
我不喜欢你。
应该吗?

really want to learn how to play piano.
but well, i cant afford lessons,
cant afford a piano.
even if i work like crazy
(which freaks me out i got phobia of overworking alr)
haish. i needa save.
like my brother.
dunno how he save can even afford a drumset =X
hmmmpppphhh...

Mama's mama's birthday!

2009-09-27T22:43:00.002+08:00

hahahaha~
recently keep blogging.
Not because i have too much time.
But because i need somewhere to blahh.
haha.

anywayy today was Tanah Merah Zone discussion meeting.
It was quite alright !
As usual, AWESOME =)
yep.
hmm, then my family (sis, bro, me and mum)
went to Yan Ge (some place) to celebrate my grandma's bday.
It was better than i expected.
I sang, and read my book.
And got along quite well with my cousins.
Heh now i am addicted to the book.
Maybe just as what Justin says,
i am a bookworm heh
I love to read, but dont read much haha.

I'm really sorry, my friends.
For what i have been recently.
I dont mean it, really...
Its just, all along i kept hoping for someone to understand how i feel.
Really sorry.
I will reflect and do my human revolution.

HSSSC stuffs,
hopefully it ends fast.

I think its time for me to take a break.
I dont want that kind of life.
I want to lead the life i want it to be.
But what should i do?

Jia youus k.
Forgiving others is a form of forgiving myself.
I just hope that you will do your human revolution too.
and do the right things..
Then we will strive together as comrades for kosen rufu.
All the best in your A levels and poly attachment.

I need alot of daimoku.
Because the power of daimoku is strong.
I will do it!

2009-09-26T11:04:00.002+08:00

My mood is really weird recently.
Mood swings i guess.
Or just lethargy i have no idea.
Maybe too many things happened,
living in confusion,
i never realised.
In this society,
this world,
this century,
it is just too difficult to be happy.
Only those ignorant ones can do so easily.

Swinging between optimism and pessimism,
i am working really hard.
Faith + Practice + Study = Joy.
It is a huge challenge because of this ugly world.

I'm so sorry but i really think you should give up.
I dont feel like facing these now.

People who have left me will never come back.
Memories should vanish too.
Its not worth it.

我希望的，
只是能在寒冷时得到温暖。
是不是不放希望，就不会失望?
天气就算再冷，
也比不上我的心冷。

DraiNeD

2009-09-22T22:35:00.002+08:00

I guess recently i am totally worn out.
Working like crazy.
Really tired. And stressed.
Yes, stress.
From work, from HSSSC stuffs.
Dunno since when,
i have been in a horrible mood.
WHY CANT YOU JUST LET ME WORK LESSER?

These days,
the thought of quitting appeared in my mind.
Since you refused to let me work lesser,
i have no choice already.
I am totally sian of working so much.
I have so many things on.
One day doing so many things.
Work (3 jobs), HSSSC (i do AFTER my work), Soka
many ppl are saying that i am crazy.
Sick still continue to work.
sigh. I dont want to be like this either.
And I am not in the mood to face other stuffs.
HORRIBLE
what happened to me?

so sorry if my tone is awful.
i really hate the recent me.

who can tell me what should i do?
saying is easier than doing it.
I want to enjoy my holidays too.
And not feeling so unhappy.

Just because i always attend,
doesnt mean i MUST attend.
I hope you ppl get my point.
Because i am seriously tired.

Who can understand?

2009-09-15T00:31:00.002+08:00

woots!
It have been quite some time since i blogged!
hahahaha busy with work and really tired heh.
Falling sick omgosh.

TPSD September Institution Meeting
Its was AWESOME!!
The emcees were really entertaining
and the skits were nice=)
Luckily, i shared my testimonial quite well (phew~)
Its really the efforts of everyone
I LOVE ALL OF YOU ! =D

The thought that we will not drift so far apart never came across my mind.
Until recently, i feel that we really are.
It is inevitable, sadly.
You have changed, or i should say, we have changed.

Please stop asking me when i have already given you an answer.
Can you understand me, can you understand how i feel?
No, i dont think you do.

Got back my results
really disappointed with myself.
But its over.
And its ok, i will strive harder !
=)

I think i need a break.
Can I? Should I?

2009-08-29T11:26:00.000+08:00

Time passes real fast.
Poly 1.1 is over.
I came to realise that my life is always in a hurry.
One day squeezing a few things.
Do i really want a life like this?
sometimes, i do hope to have a simple life.
Like Hui ting, Sinying and sarah.
A simple life.
My life is meaningful, but sometimes stressful too.
I cant turn back time,
can never go back to the simple and slacking sec sch days.
Can never go back to the time where nothing have started.
I will walk on, i will persevere.
I shouldnt look back anymore,
shouldnt waste my time hoping that i will lead that life again.

Well, after my exams (or exam i should say),
holidays are here !
finally after a busy semester...
Well, holidays are as hectic for me.
I have a total of 3 jobs. (pls dont think i am crazy)
1. Carls Jr
2. Swensens
3. Tuition

I have to learn how to plan my schedule well.
seriously.
Because having to plan to fit in the jobs,
plus my soka meetings and HSSSC meetings isnt easy.
well, i will have the wisdom to do it, i guess.

why do i need so much money?
1. Pay off my BILL (fiona dont open your eyes too big =D)
2. Zaimu ! ^^
3. Contribute to my family income
4. Return my sis $$
5. Save up for future use (holidays can work the most)
6. Buy a wardrobe maybe, mine is collapsing soon =X

hmm... really hate money sometimes.
GRR~

As someone who once loved you,
i am hurt by you.
As a friend,
i am angry with you.
As your comrade in faith,
i am extremely disappointed in you.
As a stranger,
I disapprove of your actions.
IF what happened is true.
And now, the answer to how i feel about you
is all of the above.

I cannot afford to break down,
even though everything is crashing on me
even if i am so tired.

2009-08-22T22:50:00.001+08:00

看似坚强的外壳，
脸上总是带有的微笑，
我的内心
是否一样坚强，一样快乐?
也许该对我说对不起的人，
是我自己。
抱歉，自己的软弱。
抱歉，自己会哭泣。
抱歉，自己无法预防悲伤。
抱歉，自己总是那么傻。
抱歉，自己受伤了。
我真的累了，
有谁能带我走?
不能放弃，
一定要坚强
一定要走下去...

everything is piling on me
i'm really very tired...
but i know, i have to go on
i have to take up the challenges.
i have to break through them
even if i cry alone,
even if it is so tough.
i must not be defeated.
i believe i can do it.
i will succeed.
i will show actual proof.

2009-08-15T01:37:00.002+08:00

这个世界，到底是什么颜色?
黑，白，还是彩虹?
感觉上，我好像不小心掉进海里。
盲目的挣扎，
毫无方向。
眼前，只有那片海洋。
当夜晚来临时，
海风吹得十分刺骨，
我只能用双手紧紧地抱着自己。
夜深人静，
静得就连海风的声音都特别大声。
在风吹雨打的时候，
我是否还能支撑着?
会不会有那么一天，
我就这样被卷入海里，
消失了?
现在的我，
希望能成为一座灯塔。
在大海里树立着，
就算孤单也无所谓。
希望灯塔能照亮海洋，
将光芒照射在那令人心灰的黑暗，
希望能开启闪亮的道路。
这样，就不会有人需要面对黑暗。

人生，像是一场游戏，
有输有赢。
有许多关卡必须通过。
也只有走到最后的才是赢家。
只有通过所有的挑战，
才能顺利。
在每一个挑战，
我们都不断地在成长。
但心也跟着开始累了。
就这么一天，一分钟也好
让我闭上双眼，
休息一下。
有时，
会希望有人能告诉我，
"累了，就不需勉强自己"
但始终，
只有独自在黑夜里哭泣，
哭过了就自己站起来面对挑战。
一次有一次，
连自己都不晓得，
我是变得更坚强，
还是将自己弄得更累。

这条路是自己选择的。
我必须努力往前走。
只有一直往前走，
才不会想起过去的悲伤。
我决定，
一个人往前走，
一个人面对生活，
一个人就好。

wooots ~!!
psych test is over !!!
wanted to study, but ended up keep watching VCD.
haha.
well, after this test,
here comes acad writing and journal logs !
yeahh...its not over~~
ganbatte ppl !
haha.

although i am no longer in district 1,
but i will really miss the ppl there.
Gina, Rachael, Renee, the 3 'treasures'
haha. that 3 little boys so cute.
and poh ching (miss her? i always see her)
and others...
well, its a new start i guess.
an opportunity to grow.
=)
we all have the same goal,
so lets strive and advance together ! ^^

problems are really never ending.
now facing my personal financial problem
i cant reply sms or call ppl,
only can receive sms and incoming calls.
so sry if i cant reply yeah?
health, no problem derh i think
that hospital checkup waste of time
and money omgosh ~!!
family, frens...
and no time arh~
studies, soka (increased meetings and stuffs),
HSSSC (needa work on proposals alr)
and now even more work cause need money!!
*sweat* @.@
hopefully i can really cope with everything
jia youus !

2009-08-02T00:49:00.002+08:00

hahaha~
today i shall blog in english.
cause no inspiration to blog in chinese >.<
haha.

well, tuesday i had a terrible, horrible and painful headache.
still, i stayed on to finish our CSA project.
i love our website!
it may not be the best, but its our efforts!
thanks guys for all your efforts! =)
yeah,
then wednesday i went to school.
cause there was presentation and also hui ting and I planned to rehearse
on the 4 hours break.
however i was still not feeling well
so after the rehearsal i went home
skipped psych lecture and SAA briefing.
After hours of persuasion by sarah and hui ting,
they succeeded in stopping me from going to school on thursday.
so i went to see a doctor at the polyclinic on thursday...
well, i thought it was just a terrible migraine
but the doctor diagnosed it as occipital headache >.<
then referred me to hospital...
got an appointment which is on september (super long right)
i think not so serious la...heh
anywayy, hui ting jokingly set a new module for me: stop migraines B
haha.
E-lecture every friday night on msn. >.<
hahaha.
and my careperson is sarah =S
really fortunate to have friends who care for me =)
and yeahh, now they know how stubborn i am =X
love them lots! hug hug~~
and also, thanks for the thought of buying me the mickey mouse MP3!
(although it is supposed to be a surprise)
i am very happy alr. its the thought that counts ^^
heez.

everytime i chant,
i am always thankful for what i have,
because i am really very fortunate =)
i have wonderful soka members and leaders,
i have faith and gohozon,
and i have great friends !
of course not forgetting my family ^^

today i went to my cousin Xinhui's wedding.
happy couple~
lucky today my stomach rather cooperative,
eat so much still can take it.
heh
anywayy, really hope that they can overcome any obstacles,
and stay undefeated no matter what.
all the best and congrats to them ! ^^
was really bored at the wedding
so throughout the session,
i was taking photos of the bear using my sis's phone
her phone camera better arh,
so now i think her phone has many bear bear photos =X
and yong liang gor gor was teasing me abt my height and size >.<
ROAR~!!
and i had my revenge!
he almost knocked into a small kid cause he didnt see her.
thats one bad thing abt being too tall heh !

i realised that both my sister and brother have planned their life alr
and i havent.
maybe to me, the future still seems so far away?
i am like, taking a step at a time...
well, that is fine i guess ~
heh...

phew~ i need a break
feel so tired...
anywayys, i must always strive my best !

my heart feels so empty
and tired.
every promise, every word
they are nothing when 2 people breaks up.
the memories should be shoved into my unconscious mind
REPRESSION !
i realised,
i dont want to see you.

2009-07-25T19:56:00.002+08:00

当我们拥有一切时，
总会要求更多。
但失去的时候，
却后悔当初没珍惜。
现在的我，
真的不知所措。
应该如何遗忘?
为何这幸福会在瞬间消失?
一切太突然，
使我措手不及。
以为自己能够很潇洒，
却被回忆打败了。
我成了你生命里的过客。
爱情，
像是在冒险。
不知这场恋情会走到哪里。
现在的你，
过得好吗?...

心痛比快乐更真实，
爱为何这样的讽刺。
我忘了这是第几次，
一见你就无法坚持。
孤独比拥抱更真实，
爱让人失去了理智。
会不会是我太自私，
拒绝更寂寞的日子。
放不开，也看不见未来。
难道这种不完美，
才是爱情真实的样子...

Gosh, so many assignments to do !
Laziness have crept into me again.
haha.
today went to teach tuition,
then went to meet Taizheng gor.
Thanks a zillion Gor !
everytime we go out,
its always him who is paying the money.
i feel really bad la.
this time he bought a set of aromatherapy for me.
sometimes i really am fortunate to have ppl there
unconditioned, treating me so well.
hahaz. Love him lots ! =)

2009-07-17T21:24:00.002+08:00

Hohoho~~
It've been sometime since i blogged!
really busy roar ~
well, didnt do well for my studies recently.
like, ALL my subjects.
anywayy, those are over...
now is the time we strive for the future tests, assignments and projects !!!

Problems are never ending.
recently realised how much my mum needs encouragements
but dont know how to do it!
well, when there is will, there is way !
i shall not give up and try my best!
hopefully she will change that mindset of hers. ~

nothing much to blog all of a sudden
shall update again when i have the inspiration heh

2009-07-06T13:59:00.002+08:00

wow! this is my 100th post!
hahaz...cool right?
=X
this is getting boring~!!
should be having lessons now,
but my school got 2 cases of H1N1,
and we were in contact with the people,
so...got quarantined...
LOA was given to my class until tuesday,
or maybe thursday..
(please dont envy me k)
i really hope everyone will be alright.
and they will recover soon.
I never felt the threat of H1N1 until now...
thought it was very far away from me.
hmmz...now i can say, we never know..

anywayy, have been going into slack mode
really slacking le....
good, and bad
good cause it have been long since i relaxed,
and i have been over stressed.
bad, cause once i start, its hard to stop =X
haha.
like now, no motivation to do work.
arggghhh!!!
ah well~ i shall try again later haha

lyrics time again!

好爱她好想她再这样下去我只会更牵挂
爱到最后我们还是改变不了
祝福她拥有他所有的有情人终成眷属啊
你给过的美好留在没有人到得了的地方
看你微笑~

i feel so silly, but it makes sense.
i have not undo the mental knot in my heart.
so, it really isnt over yet.
cause i have not let go...

2009-06-27T00:31:00.005+08:00

wow!
recently have been abit too busy.
(you must be thinking that i say that everytime right?)
well, its true lahx...
why am i always packed with stuffs to do?
so tired arh~~~
and immune system getting low.
meiwah its time to reflect!

yep, TPSD JUNE INSTITUITION MEETING IS HERE!!!
YAY~!!
well, i put in alot of effort in my videos so i hope it goes well.
hopefully i didnt do badly arh...
lets all jia youus together ! =)

HSS AGM IS HERE TOO!
"MY BIG FAT GEEK AFFAIR"
so hss ppl do look forward to it k!
its time to be GEEKY~!!

well, recently many things happened.
hurts...
can i still love you?
or i shouldnt, cause its painful...
thanks for loving me.
thanks for all the care you showered upon me.
sorry for being so selfish..
why cant we walk towards the end hand in hand?...
i'm trying, to do what you want me to promise you.

2009-06-20T21:16:00.003+08:00

Where is strong and determined meiwah,
who will firmly say : i can do it and i will do it ?
Where is the crappy and cranky meiwah,
who laughs and go around being crazy?
Where is the strong and determined meiwah,
who promised to always uphold strong faith?
Where is the meiwah,
who always wants to live up to be a true disciple of sensei?
Where is the meiwah,
who always wanted to make a difference in ppl's lives?
Where have all the purpose and mission faded to?
Where is the joy and sense of achievements she always had?

what happened, why have everything disappeared?
why am i only left with lethargy to be with.
I am doing my stuffs in the wrong way.
Sry, i am trying to mend it.
Because of the workload,
why am i doing it just for the sake of finishing it?
This just isnt the way meiwah does things.

The answer will come to me.
The decision will be made.
I am just trying to be fair.
But i'm tired enough.

2009-06-18T00:16:00.002+08:00

当拥抱不再温暖，
笑声换成一阵冷漠时，
我们之间比陌生人还要陌生，
比海洋更遥远。
我是否还该握着属于你的一切?
不舍得放手。
为何如此固执?
为何不能简单?
为何让我作抉择?
为什么，
我总是如此摇摆不定?
为什么，
我又在问为什么?
突然累了...

疲惫的心，
要坚强、不能因此倒下。
就让我自己面对，
请赐给我多点时间好吗?

Let me rest..
Far away from everything else.
can I?

2009-06-11T16:07:00.002+08:00

Seriously, this weather is killing me.
Wanted to go out with my sis and mummy
but stayed at home cause i couldnt stand this stupid hot weather.
argh!

Well, last sunday was our SD Rufu Run.
i didnt know i was a trainer until last friday.
haha but it was alright=)
We went there and prepared ourselves.
Location was at Toa Payoh Town Park.
At the beginning of the race,
we had to finish a puzzle and run to the first station
to get the tap card to kick off the race.
I ran after we finished the puzzle,
and wow.
i fell >.<
after that, i blacked out.
it was strange why i blacked out but after a while of resting
i felt better.
So i went to the 7 legged race and joined them
Cheered to my best ability with my other fellow
TPSD-ians.
and YAY!!
TPSD WON!!!
We didnt win the race nor the cheers,
but we won the overall.
You know, i was deeply touched and happy that day
Not because i blacked out of course,
but because all of us really gave our very best.
The spirit and everything.
The best which everyone gave, is really....touching.
and also, thanks for all the concern!
i am alright!!
hahaz
thanks all TPSD-ians!
Meiwah loves all of you!!!=)
heez.
Lets always keep that spirit going!!!
^^

Tuesday and yesterday was the SAA training camp
for all student leaders.
HSS only had like 6 ppl,
and the end of the camp left 3 =S
anywayy,
it was quite alright
we learnt many stuffs.
and played mulitple captains' ball,
dragon boating and high ALP.
Didnt go for the ALP cause i wasn't feeling well.
Its still a time for bonding!
We slept at the sports complex haha.

I think my body is really failing me,
and also the dumb weather.
i feel weak, tired and giddy all the time.
cant stand it.
How to do my stuffs when i am feeling like that?
sigh, ah well.
i shall do my best.

I really feel very fortunate to have joined soka.
reason being i am loved and cared for.
i feel the warmth.
Thanks, my district leaders and members,
and my SD ppl.
My CICs SiYi and Lynette =)
and also all the SD ppl who cared for me during the rufu run.
heez. it is all because of all of you that i can feel fortunate and happy!
infinite thanks!
my life have expanded after joining soka.
I shall strive to grow stronger in faith,
and one day be victorious!
i wanna do my best and one day,
be able to help the ppl around me.
it is my hope and life.
=)

anywayy~
holidays are here!
but many stuffs to do like camps,
and meetings (soka, project, HSSSC)
and yeah, assignments.
i shall try to enjoy everything that i do.
jia youus ganbatte!!!

I love you.
But is that everything?
Maybe thats really the best solution.
Both of us are not at fault
all the best
=)

2009-05-25T19:53:00.002+08:00

Recently had been really busy with school work
and many stuffs.
I might have drifted further from anyone of you.
But trust me, i dont want that to happen either
But i realised, as we get busy with our own lives
all these are inevitable.
My school and yours are different.
We are active in our school activities and stuffs.
I'm seriously getting really tired.
And realised that no one understands at all.
Maybe, no one can see the efforts i made,
no one can see how hard i tried.
No one can see how tough it is.
What is it that is pushing me to move on?
To not give up?
Its something inside me, my faith.
I am trying really hard,
to juggle so many things.
Is that my best?
I can do more, i can do better.
Just like the activity in APEL,
even when i thought i tried my best,
my next try is always higher, better.
So where is my limit?
I guess, just like what peizhen says,
we will never know where is our limit until we push ourselves hard.
I will continue to try my best.
I shall persevere and hold on firmly to my beliefs.
Only those who stay undefeated are victors in their life.
Jia youus bahx, meiwah...
I can do it, no matter how tough it is...
Even if no one understands...
I didnt mean to drift further,
i am trying my best.

2009-05-21T21:33:00.003+08:00

woots!
finally i blogged.
think this blog is really rotting if i still dont post anything haha.
well recently had been really busy for me so didnt have the time
and mood to blog.

Sometimes i look back and realised how much my life changed.
During secondary school,
my life is plainly school stuffs.
Upon graduating,
many things entered my life.
Soka, work, tuition and etc..
all of a sudden i had many things to do.
And now adding on is my studies which is getting really tense
and stressful.
Dont think i'm doing well, i have lots to catch up with.
sigh, ah well~
shall juz try my best.
and i learnt a lesson not to leave things to the last minute
especially when there are so many things waiting for me to complete them.

mabel is right.
we are drifting further but its smth that is inevitable isnt it?
like what you said,
one day we wont be able to understand what each other says.
i'll be speaking in pyschology terms while hers in business terms.
then we will be like, huh??
hahaz
but our love and frenship for one another remains =)

last wednesday was my campaign speech for HSSSC
it was unexpected.
everyone said i did well.
on that day,
i am really very happy.
before my speech, my frens were throwing me encouragements
giving me their support.
when i stepped onto the "stage"
i was extremely touched.
my classmates and frens cheered me on loudly.
the feeling was...cant be described.
thanks, my dear 1A02!!!
love all of you lots!!! =D
i really hope we wont change class,
i really like this class and hope that we will always be together.
1A02 ROX!!!
heez XD

i'm sorry if i didnt trust you enough,
but the problem have always been there.
I am getting really tired,
and i think that one day,
you will feel tired of it too.
thats why i wanted you to think about it,
consider whether we are right.
whether on 29th jan that decision is right.

TANAH MERAH YOUTH OUTING 3!!!
yep yep!
its here again!
our most anticipated youth outing is coming in just 9 DAYS!!
cool right?!
There'll be lots of FUN and GAMES!
so lets all have FUN TOGETHER K!!!
=DD

took a some sort of personality test today
turned out me and keith have a high level of OCD
OMGOSH~~~
Keith, are we normal or abnormal??
haha
its quite true that my life seems to be tense
but it have expanded,
and at least i'm not spending it without any meaning.

just a week ago my computer crashed.
good time to spoil ehh.
when i had lots to do and i needed the computer BADLY.
thanks karkoon for letting me use your com!
haha.
*pat pat*
tiger cub shall give you cabbage k, kitty?
haha
roar

tuesday went to my sister's graduation ceremony.
yep, in tp.
she finished her education there and mine just started =/
when i was there, i told my mum: how i wish it was me who is graduating.
and my mum laughed at that.
=(
she said: you just started and still have such a long way!
and i gave her a sad face.
haha

my dear dear angie how are you??
doing well with jc?
remember our promise to always reward ourselves
when we achieved smth?
yes, when we have the time,
we shall go enjoy and reward ourselves!
let us use the OPERANT CONDITIONING!!
haha.
jia youus!

after weeks of busy-ness,
finally today i can have the chance to rest more.
not that i have nth to do lerh,
still have LOTS to do.
but i need to rest!!
sleep deprivation results in hallucinations k
so ppl, we must have adequate SLEEP!!
=D

i want to live happily,
and strive hard to find absolute happiness.
one that does not get affected easily.
i want to live it to the fullest.
The secret lies behind my mission and purpose =)

Life ultimately hinges on whether one has truly strived,
whether one has truly advanced.
-Ikeda Sensei

2009-04-23T23:25:00.002+08:00

经过我们曾走过的路，
回忆渐渐出现在脑海里。
仿佛在看电影，
那熟悉却又陌生的剧情...
我们正扮演着主角的角色，
当时，
寒冷的天气将我的双手变冷。
就在双手结成冰之前，
一双温暖的手牵着我，
带我离开。
久而久之，
我开始习惯了那双手牵着我的温暖。
夜晚时刻，
当你不在身边时，
我独自一人走在街上，
路人一个一个走过。
抬头凝视夜空，
小星星仍挂在天空中，
像是在保护着我。
从星星发出的光芒，
我深深地感受到一丝安全感。
爱情像是一个陷阱，
一旦陷下去，
便难以解脱。
也许是我没勇气去爱你...
有一天，
我会不会突然喊停?

will we be able to break through the obstacles together
and reach the end?
or will we get separated at the crossroads?
the answer lies in the future...

ChoiR

2009-04-13T22:50:00.002+08:00

today is monday~~!!
heh, doesnt make much a difference to me
since i'm having my super long holidays
which is going to end soon!!
aww...~~
anywayy, today we went back to Damai.
Me, my dear koonhiang, my ah bu mabel and zhuoyi...
decided to visit choir and see how's their preparation
for the upcoming SYF.
Choir's SYF is held on our first day of school >.<
ah well~
hopefully time permits us to attend haha
hmm, i seriously dunno what to say abt it.
choir,
please give in your best effort on the stage k?
treasure the moment when you have the chance to.
Choir is a CCA which recruits ppl who have passion in singing.
So why aren't you guys doing it?
Those who are not putting in their best effort,
why not?
I can understand the feeling of being lectured by seniors,
cause we had been through that too.
but do you understand why are they doing all these?
because they only really hope that you ppl
will sing with your hearts.
is that so difficult?
if you have no passion in singing,
why in the first place you join choir?
juz because it seems like a slacking CCA,
a place to enjoy the air-con?
choir isn't an easy CCA..
it requires so much teamwork and coordination
from EVERYONE.
for those who have been trying very hard,
i really wanna say:
THANK YOU, and WE REALLY APPRECIATE IT.
although we have left choir,
and alr old liaoz~~
but our spirits never left choir.
we really hope for the best for the coming SYF.
DO YOUR BEST PPL!!
SING WITH YOUR HEARTS
USE YOUR BEAUTIFUL VOICES AND ENJOY!!
jia youus k my dear juniors?
we seniors love all of you! =)

and then~
councillors...
sigh.
choir and councillors.
the 2 "C"s which i dedicated myself to during
my secondary school days...
i'm not that clear of what is going on
of course, i alr graduated =S
but hearing from ppl,
it doesnt seem to be going on well.
not only abt the sec 1 camp,
but also the standard...
haish.
i kinda miss the days whereby we plan events
and carry out our duties.
so many things have changed
after we left.
anywayy, all the best.

as for now,
we're moving on to the next phase of our lives.
interphase, prophase, metaphase =P
sot liao...~
我的人生就像一趟旅程,
boarding the next bus =)

zzzzzz,
nth to blog liaoz.
see la,
keep rushing me to blog...
this post like no content like that
roar!
hehe =D

I Believe

2009-04-06T12:32:00.002+08:00

Seems like times are really bad recently eh
i never really noticed though i know
maybe cause i am being too protected.
as a student and child,
i dont need to face the society changes.
But no fear,
there's nothing we cant overcome k?
As long as we stay strong,
nothing can defeat us!!
jia youus k?

Recently i realised Peizhen is right.
I have changed alot, much better.
Though sometimes i will be like in the past,
i will fall and cry,
but i can feel that inside me,
there's a wall building up.
A wall which blocks away negative thoughts.
Still in progress though,
no idea when will the construction be complete haha
It takes time,
but i believe one day, it will be completed.
As long as i persevere...
Although there are times whereby i ask:
can i juz give up?
But inside me,
i know that i dont want to.
I want to move on,
i want to succeed,
i want to win this battle.

All of us face different problems
and different problems affect us at a different level.
Because all of us are different.
But i strongly believe that everything will be alright.
We can overcome all hardships =)
Don't worry k? ironman >.<
i'm always here with you ^^

对不起

2009-04-05T23:56:00.002+08:00

在这个拥挤的世界里，
有时候身边的人明明不少，
感觉仍是孤单寂寞。
但你是否曾停留半刻，
仔细聆听自己的心里?
它不断地呼喊着要你坚强，
要你快乐。
一直以来，
我认为快乐总是离我很遥远，
以为快乐是我无论多努力都触摸不到的感觉。
你可否想过，
一直这样想的我们，
快乐吗?
幸福吗?
这样地想着，
快乐就会来临吗?
也许近来的我，
因为自己的过于忙碌而忽略了你。
但我真的希望你知道，
我还在，不曾离开过。
最近对你的忽略，我真的很抱歉。
记得我曾说过，
我正在努力改变自己，
也希望你能改变自己悲观的想法，
让自己变得更坚强、乐观。
只要像刚强的大树一样，
有着强壮的树根，
挺挺地，勇敢地站着，
它不曾害怕风吹雨打，
因为它坚信，
它不会倒下，它要坚强地度过难关。
对于必要面对的黑夜，
它更是坚定。
因为它知道，
黑夜的转弯是白天，
每一个黑夜都会有成为白天的时候。
带着所有的坚强，
它渡过了一个又一个的黑夜、困难。
不要害怕黑夜的降临，
更不要畏惧眼前的悲伤，
因为只要你坚强乐观，
无论夜有多黑，
路有多漫长，
你都能将黑夜转为白天。
因为那时的你，
就是照亮身边所有人、事、物
那盏耀眼的灯。
也许周围的种种令你的心疲惫不堪，
甚至使你失去了自己剩余的快乐和信念，
但千万不要放弃，
因为生命是属于自己独特的一种礼物
你要珍惜，更要让自己活得有价值。
不要放弃追寻快乐，
因为我坚信，
总有一天，你一定能得到
能看到周围美丽的风景
感受快乐的陪伴。

爱情?

2009-04-04T00:06:00.003+08:00

爱情，是两个人手牵着手，一起走向未来。
然而在途中，有谁会选择先放手?
当第三者的手出现时，
他们是否还能紧握着手不放?
爱一个人，
是思念。是回忆的缠绕。是希望他幸福。
爱情，是厮守一生，
是一起在困难中努力、奋斗。
在爱情里，
我们追寻的，是什么?
是一丝安全感，心跳的节奏，还是那份感动?
也许只是想在这吵杂的世界里，
找到宁静，填满心中的空虚。
毫无要求的爱情，其实是最幸福的。
但贪心的人们，总是要求不断，
总是无法满足。
他们就这样被蒙住了心，
早已忘却爱情最真实的样子。
在茫茫人海中，
他们努力寻找，
希望在某个时候，某个场合，
能遇到对的人。
他们一直往前看，
将视线放在远方。
其实他们并没发现，
也许最简单的幸福，
一直就在身边。

我们之间，
像是乘搭着火车往不同的方向驶去。
也许有一天当距离太遥远的时候，
我们的手，再也无法牵着走下去。

heh heh...
i almost forgot abt something!!
my chapter 3!!
haha those who read my posts last time would know
hehe.
i wrote chapter 1 & 2,
then disappeared haha.
ehh note that this is not chapter 3 k?
i'm still working on it hahaz.
will post it when its done alright?
any suggestions on what topic feel free to let me know!

anywayy, recently my life juz revolves around
soka,work,tuition...
and reading and writing!
hmm, sounds boring?
i find it still alright..

i find myself rather contradicting sometimes.
sometimes i rather everything is juz a dream.
when the dream ends, i wake up and everything
is still the same.
yet,
i am grateful that everything isn't the same.
i dont want to go back to that memory...
ah well~
we can never go back to the past.
since i've chosen this path,
i should persevere on.
yeah... =)

人生的旅程

2009-03-25T00:48:00.002+08:00

我的人生，就像是一趟旅程

出生来到这世上，像刚踏出门

渐渐成长，我正往巴士站走去。

在巴士站，

等待着巴士的，是各种各样的人

老少咸宜，

有的单独一个人，

有的与家人、朋友、情人，

沉浸在自己的世界、交谈中。

这些人，就是我生命里在某个时候停留时出现的人。

他们让我等待巴士的时间变得多姿多彩。

然而，当他们各自的巴士已来到，

是他们离开的时候了，

往自己的目标、自己的使命走去。

我的车也来到了面前，

乘搭着巴士，

路过形形色色的人、事、物，

我走向生命的另一段。

有时候，巴士站没人，

自己也得面对孤单寂寞的煎熬

但我相信，

巴士站不可能永远都如此空荡。

总有一天，

它还是会被人们的欢笑布满

制造出热闹的气氛

到时候，心里不再落寞。

就这样一站过一站，

一段接一段

我努力往属于自己独特的目标前去

完成这一生的使命。

巴士站的人，

车上曾映入眼帘的景物，

他们都形成了我生命中最真贵的回忆

存在我心里的某个细胞里，

成为我的一部分。

我相信我所相信的。

这个世界，

存在着三种颜色。

分别为白、灰、黑。

也许现在的社会，

黑正领先。

然而我坚信，

只要我们不断努力，

只要我们不放弃，

只要白站得坚定，

总有一天

我们必定能将灰变成白。

而黑，

在白的熏陶下

成为优秀的使命着。

身为日莲大圣人弟子的我们，

这就是我们的使命、我们共同的目标。

幸福是我的，不是你给的…

我放弃了，

不再藏有那希望。

不再盼望你会在我身边，

陪我历经种种困难。

世界上最遥远的距离，

是两颗心之间的距离。

我和你，

就算彼此就在眼前，

感觉仍是遥不可及。

也许，

这一切真的是一场错误…

2009-03-02T19:48:00.004+08:00

从遥远的过度，
我努力往前看，
希望能看见美好的未来，
和一道清楚的走道。
然而当希望之桥逐渐建起时，
一块巨大的石头将它崩塌了。
身边的一切改变仿佛来得太突然
时间也毫不留情地快速奔跑
只剩我停留在那里。
躺在绿油油的草地上，
我享受着微风带来的感觉
它好像就在安慰着我
告诉我是时候休息一下
让疲惫的心睡一觉
天空像是一张很大的棉被
有了星星的陪伴，
它不曾感到孤单
散发出的温暖，
将每一颗冷却的心瞬间溶化。
我的希望，
能持续多久?

真爱只存在我们的幻想里
在这残酷的世界
我无法相信爱情

2009-01-22T15:29:00.002+08:00

明知道这是一场错误，
为什么我还是陷下去?
你的温柔呵护，
始终让我无法忘怀。
但为什么在我心动之后，
你再消失?
在你那忙碌的生活里，
我扮演的，是多么渺小的角色。
想起你的微笑
你的身影
你的眼神....
思念的声音响起，
提醒我还爱你。
你知道吗，
我好想你.....

Tanah Merah Central!

2008-12-21T02:18:00.002+08:00

woots~!
i'm back~~!!
hmm...lemme see how do i start..
well, guess many ppl know i converted religion le
yepz,
and i'm really glad to be able to come across this
to know PeiZhen
Its my good fortune to know her and of course soka.
its peizhen who taught me many things,
get me more involved in everything
the discussion meetings,
FD meetings and many events etc etc..
Peizhen have been encouraging me all these while.
Using Sensei's words and her explanation,
taught me many things,
gave me hope.
I am really thankful.
Thanks alot Peizhen! =)
however, now that she've been promoted as the chapter leader,
i guess she have lesser time for me..
like what my mama said,
she will lead and guide me for this period of time,
after that i'll have to walk on my own..

well, today was the youth outing!
we had great fun!
yepz!
heez
the games are nice even though they were last minute.
not bad!!!=)
but now black like charcoal le haha
got sunburnt =X
Team 4 was at first at the last position,
but dont look down on our fighting spirit!
we didnt give up until the last minute,
and at least became the second last =/
ah well~
hahaz
but its not the prize and position...
is the sense of satisfaction with myself
that we never gave up even till the last minute.
woots team four~!
hee
finally, i wanna say...... :
TANAH MERAH CENTRAL ROX!!!
3 cheers for tanah merah central! yeah!

21 December 2008
finally this day arrived.
i will be going to Senja later on.
its the joyous occasion for many ppl!=)
hahaz
okok~ after a morning of games,
and 8 hours of work straight after,
i think physically i'm tired.
heez.
cya~!

2008-12-10T20:10:00.004+08:00

it's really heartbreaking,
to see someone that close to you,
being the person you will dislike most.
maybe in the first place,
i shouldnt have trusted you..
i'm so disappointed in you.

如果你不是真心的，
就不要对我这么好...

Faith

2008-11-28T21:15:00.002+08:00

21 December 2008
I'm waiting and looking forward for this very special day.
On that day, it will be really joyous and happy.
This day also marks the beginning of my route towards happiness.
The route towards dreams.
Something i really hoped for.
And will treasure it with all my heart.

Faith is a very important thing in life..
With faith, one can achieve many things.
It gives us strength, hope, allows us to persevere.
I am fortunate to have the chance to come across this.
I believe i can achieve, together with the others,
the huge dream that we all share in common.
CHEERS! =)

Obstacles are part of our life,
only by overcoming them will be become stronger.
No matter how tough a situation is,
we should challenge them.

so...we muz jia youus!!

Lost again

2008-11-19T18:40:00.002+08:00

recently everything seems to be in a mess
o levels have ended,
shouldnt it be freedom and joy?
why do i feel so upset?...
i'm really lost.
how am i supposed to continue?...
i really dont know anymore

O's are over!!!

2008-11-16T00:18:00.005+08:00

woots~~!!!
o's are finally over!!!
oh man juz dont have the feeling
dunno why
the day whereby all graduating students have been looking forward to
yet no one have the super happy feeling
heh no idea why eh.
well, lemme start off with the first day of my freedom

Thursday, 13 November 2008'
Bio paper was quite ok.
and after that, me and mabel went home to bathe
and set off to marina square to meet tong..
heh..tong treated us at hot pot culture!
thanks a lot tong!!!
heh...there's tong, me, mabel, cass, and koon hiang
yepz
we had porridge buffet.
dunno how expensive =/
but it was nice eating and chatting together!
heez
actually mei and marion was coming along too
but they have to arrive late so me and mabel didnt have the chance to see them
we have to move on to the next station.
see la, mei treat me like this
hahaz juz joking
well, then me and mabel moved to aljunied
to dye and cut hair..
both of us wanted to cut shorter,
ended up both our hair as long as before
hahaz
yep
heh i was FURIOUS man
the hair stylist i asked for was too busy
so i have no choice but to take the other one
and unluckily....
that was the manager of the salon!!!
so she charge more expensive
so angry la!
after everything done,
i was grumbling to mabel:
" she think she manager so what, why muz charge more expensive! i so sad"
and mabel have to repeat a zillion times:
"dont sad lah"
haa...
poor me..
well, i dyed copper brown,
while mabel dyed reddish brown
haha
quite nice lahx
hahaz
yeah,
after that we went to bugis street cause mabel needed to buy her stuffs
then went to orchard to sing K.
heh heh...
yepz.
then after that went home...
heh~

Friday, 14 November 2008
it was the day whereby Damai Voicez have a concert
and we bought the tickets to watch them
as they needed make up,
mr wong asked some seniors to come help them
so me, mabel, zhuo yi, wei lin, koon hiang and jia min
went to help them
i helped with the eye shadow,
koon hiang with the hair and mascara
wei lin also eye shadow
mabel with the lip gloss
and zhuo yi with the blusher...
jia min also eye shadow
hahaz
yepz
so was a busy time with their make up.
heh, it was the first time i help ppl put make up
not horrible de ok~~
me skills not that bad eh.
hahaz
after that i went to angie's house to watch
" they kiss again"
yepz
actually it was because that angie too eager to see my hair>.<
after that went to meet mabel and the others
went to victoria concert hall...
heh.
and mabel was saying:
" is damai choir under a curse or what.
why in school sing not nice,
and when sing there always so nice"
i agreed totally man
they sing really beautifully that day.
but the song "lollipop"
the actions not very nice
cause some ppl forget their actions.
hahaz
but the singing still ok.
yepz
and the song "i'll be there"
sang by our choir
was super nice la!
so got feeling de man.
i am so proud of my choir man
not me brag leh
really sang nice
heh..
and the ending song by the combined
4 choirs was very beautiful!
heh...
and all the pianists play very nice
me, mabel, koon hiang and mei ling
were so mesmerized by the sound of the piano
played by the pianists...
heh heh...
and i said:
"next time my boyfriend muz know how to play piano"
>.<
hahaz
well, after everything ended,
me and mabel went petal gardens de mac
then went home~

today~~~!!!
went SSA FD meeting
was my first time, and maybe my last time
cause i graduate le
>.<
well~
today nth much
hahaz

okok~~
shall end here.
cya~!

hoho~

2008-11-12T15:11:00.003+08:00

heh heh!
tomorrow's the last paper of my O Levels!!
happy for me?
heez, now can la...
when get back results, dont cry for me..
hahaz

well, wanna start with Monday, 10 November 2008
was my physics paper 1 that day.
but that day feels like my bday!
hahaz
cause Mabel passed me the bday prezzie,
some of my classmates sang bday song for me!
err seriously was rather paisehh =X
haha
but thanks alot ppl! =)

Thanks for the DEATH NOTE PREZZIE:
1. mabel
2. jaf (unknowingly gave me 2 prezzies)
3. jun rong (went with mabel)
4. wei shan
5. yu tong
6. cassandra
7. haris (i'm so honoured!)

hahaz...and here's another thanks to my another bunch of good frenz!

Thanks for the err...whats that called? PURPLE BOX WITH NICE THINGS INSIDE
MY FAVOURITE COLOUR!! ITS BEAUTIFUL!!
ok..Thanks to:
1. SeowJia
2. Wanteng
3. Hui ling
4. Hui yi

geez! hahaz and of course, those who gave me prezzie before le!
thanks for remembering me and my bday! =)
Love you all lots!!!

well, today was chemistry paper one.
and one word to describe: DOOMED!
hahaz
hmm, tml's biology paper one.
wanna do well for that since i'm counting on it
hope can do well!!
heh...many ppl finished their o's on tuesday..
left us poor peeps.
nvm~~
haaz
jia youus!

i have no choice but to forget you.
and i will try to live meaningfully
without you

Life

2008-10-22T11:30:00.005+08:00

have been wondering what life is about
ppl say i tend to think too much
but i juz wanna know what i'm searching for in this world
so as to make my life more meaningful by doing things i like
but realised,
there are adverse effects.
yeah, you're right.
i think too much...

seen the many kinds of ppl
ppl who are more grown ups especially,
make me realise that this world is huge
thats what i dont like.
i dont like competition.
i dont like fighting for something.
i juz like peace.

humans are strange creatures actually.
different kinds, like different species.
thats the whole thing about psychology
understanding the different kinds
i believe, there is a common thing in everyone
common trend even
i shall find out one day=)

however, knowing too much might not be good either
contradicting >.<

一直以来，我努力地追寻着
希望能找到属于自己的一片天空
自由地飞翔。
也许在途中，
我迷失了方向。
沉浸在一个黑暗的隧道里，
我用尽所有的力气，
盼望能有重见光芒的一天。
然而，
这一天始终都没来过。
它总是忽近忽远
让人渐渐失去希望。
久而久之，
我甚至开始怀疑这就是命中注定，
无法解脱。
但这是我的生命、我的人生。
我不希望自己永远处在不快乐的世界里徘徊
总是盼望快乐的我,
是否真能找到出路?
在寻找快乐和新生命的途中，
我希望我有力量坚持到底。
找到属于我的自由世界。
我喜欢自由，
那不受约束的感觉。
也许最简单的幸福一直都在我们的身边...
每一个生命的诞生，
都有着一个真贵的含义。
而每一个人，
都应该让自己活得有价值。
因为我深信，
每个人都有掌握快乐的资格和能力。

我很欣慰，
因为你过得很好。
也许我们从此不再相遇，
永远记得你微笑的眼睛......

changes

2008-10-09T09:33:00.004+08:00

hoho~ i'm here again
me dont seem like a sec 4 student eh?
still got time to slack when i haven study at all
=/

anywayz, i've made a decision
decided to change my religion.
have been pondering over it very long le
well, it takes quite some courage to do it
( or is it i too lousy? )
many factors that held me back.
firstly, i'm afraid that changing religion like is a betrayal to our original one
second, dunno how will my siblings think.
anywayz, yeah.
juz decided to do it..

reason: not too sure either
hahaz
maybe cause i'm really too tired bahx...
need something to rely on.
and, many things are juz beyond our control.
i need a change in life.
can be considered a start off bahx..
hahaz

okok....here's some lyrics i find the words really nice!
nicely described! =)

S.H.E's new song: 沿海公路的出口

用一根火柴烧一场蜃楼
藉这场大雨让自己逃走
荒茫公路无人的漂泊
寂寞海啸把我卷走

用一段感情换一个朋友
每一句再见割一道伤口
躲在万劫不复的街头
微笑参透覆水难收

倘若说放一次手
就像咳一个嗽
我又何苦在乎得不到的温柔

我坐在公路的出口
等待天黑以後无边的寂寞
连想你都是种残酷切磋

我目送沿海的日落
紧抱一个醉生梦死的枕头
留不住回忆却学不会放手
怎麽走

after all this, i'm really very tired...

My BiRthDaY! =)

2008-10-06T00:48:00.005+08:00

well, firstly me want to thank everyone!
hahaz thanks for everything!=)

i was blessed with birthday wishes and prezzies!=)

yepz, turn old liaoz. 16 years old le
mabel called me little woman,
she say cannot call me girl girl le.
say me old, she older than me leh...
roar!

hahaz. anywayz wanna thank ppl!

special thanks to:
1. Hui Yan jie (p)
2. KarKoon (p)
3. Jaf (p)
4. Poh Ching mei (p)
5. Si Ying and Zhi Han (p)
6. Angie
7. Mabel(p)
8. Langston
9. KoonHiang (p)
10. Mei Ling(p)
11. Yi Xuan cousin
12. Cassandra(p)
13. Haris(p)
14. Sister (p)
15. Desmond
16. YingYing
17. Waranya
18. Leslie
19. Belinda
20. Jun Rong(p)
21. Wei Shan(p)
22. Yu Tong(p)
23. Seow Jia (p)
24. Wan Teng (p)
25. Hui Ling (p)
26. Hui Yi(p)

heez i love everyone of you!!=)

well, this may not be the best birthday.
i wont try to make my birthday special anymore.
5th October shall be a day to receive birthday wishes and prezzies!
not any special occasion or anything..
hahaz...

hmm, but i'm happy!
hahaz
this year o levels still got ppl remember my bday
hahaz
really touched.
thanks!!!

those who are having o levels,
jia youus k?
we shall work hard together!!!
hahaz

for other ppl:
also jia youus in everything you do!

me crap arh...might as well say everyone jia youus
hahaz

this birthday...is an unhappy birthday though.
but, ah well~
sigh....
unfortunately things happened the day before my bday
but its alright.
i'm happy by the blessings and birthday wishes=)
and my prezzies!
heez arigato ppl!

well, now its time to leave everything behind for the time being,
and work hard for o levels!
yeah man~
cannot forget de
hahaz

i wont forget you.
cause i cant bear to..
thanks....

DeRrIcK's AlbuM

2008-09-26T23:53:00.003+08:00

today's a happy day!
though really very tired..
tired mentally and physically
hahaz

I received my first birthday present for this year!
a bit very early lahx.. hahaz
really excited!
DERRICK'S 改版 ALBUM!!!
i'm so happy~
thanks alot! =)

well, had been tight on money recently
then derrick's 改版 came too sudden
but of course i will still fork out money buy lahx
so intended to buy it today de
hahaz.
didnt expect it became a birthday present instead.

oh man...
though really happy,
but mind shut down le
haha..

o levels- ganbatte!!
do my best can le.
thats it.
jia youus!!!
its super near now...
scary...

i shall make this birthday meaningful
even without you.

时间的使命

2008-09-18T17:25:00.003+08:00

在我们以婴儿的身份来到这世上的那刻起，
时间就已开始滴答滴答地在计算。
每一个生命，
上天都给了一个固定的时间，
让他掌握自己的人生。
有些人选择享受人生，
有些人选择努力前进，
有些人则选了荒废一生，
成天游手好闲。
生命是自己的，
那段上天送给我们的宝贵时间，
就要看我们如何使用、如何完成它的使命。
人生也许就像在和时间赛跑，
看谁能在那固定的时间内让自己活得最有价值。
问问自己的内心，
想得到什么?
想改变什么?
想拥有什么?
当一个人或一样东西还存在的时候，
它总是显得不起眼，
被冷落。
但当失去了的时候，
才发现它的可贵。
时间，就已经获胜了。
因为我们还没来得及珍惜它，
它就不在了。
别去遗憾自己得不到什么，
应该看看自己拥有什么，
能做到什么。
就在那固定的时间里，
珍惜身边的一切，
跟着自己的愿望做些改变，
让那段时间成为最有意义的时光。

haha~ can type in chinese le!
using internet explorer.
which i dun like cause sot sot de.
anywayz, prelims is over.
results are out.
some quite ok, others....sigh

well, life is a strange thing.
there'll be some ppl who seem to be facing the same thing
while others dont seem to be able to understand.
some can see the tears behind the smiles,
while others cant see it.

things that are gone,
i cant get them back.
those who are leaving,
i cant hold them back.
maybe its smth to do with me.
i have no idea.
whatever it is,
i have given up.

i want a new life.
a new life without many ppl,
many things, many memories.
without all of you..

i'm so sorry
but i really cant take it anymore...

oh well~

2008-09-13T20:51:00.003+08:00

sigh....
why like that?
thought new version should be better de?
why become worse?
mozilla cant read chinese!
roar~~~!!!!
haizz, so this means:
i cant type any chinese stuffs le!
oh well~
so ppl have to read my lousy english...
i might as well dun blog...zzz

anywayz, actually had something in mind to type de
yeah..
but, why like this??!!!
sigh sigh sigh~~
this mozilla indeed looks nicer
but ....haizz
never mind~

recently mood super sian
why?
answer is obvious: o levels
hahaz lost the momentum le
guess many ppl are like me bahx

To all those who despise me that i cant do it:
I shall show you what i can do

To all those who have faith and confidence in me:
Thanks and i will do my best^^

To all those who have been encouraging me
Thanks alot!!=) i really appreciate it.

To all those who are taking o levels like me:
well, we're in the same boat so lets all jia youus together!

To Derrick and his fans:
Love all of you! Jia Youus and never give up!!

To you:
How i wish you would know.. But you have forgotten.
I shall wish you all the best and may happiness surround you like it always had.

5th of October, will you remember?
i guess you wont..

If you're happy, i'm contented.
Its time i say goodbye to you

2008-08-27T22:25:00.005+08:00

hohoho~ i'm back again!
juz finished SS, Geography and English Prelims only
and feel like slacking already~
yeah, i dun seem like a Sec 4 student isnt it?
muahahaha~ straight away reach home
went to watch VCD le..
anywayz. these days seem to have many things on my mind
yeah, isnt right since i'm facing my O's soon
sigh~
oh man!
cant type chinese!
the new updated mozilla cannot read the chinese
haish...

i realised things change fast
friendships, attitudes, thinkings....
they might change in a week,
in days,
or even in a second.
makes everything so unpredictable
that makes life interesting isnt it?
not knowing the future
but curious.

oh my~
i suddenly ran out of things to say
shall juz end here then
hahaz!

2 months

2008-08-16T23:46:00.003+08:00

2 months left.
to o levels.
really want to do well...
i want to prove my capabilities
too many things changing recently
i know i cannot get affected now
its the crucial part

i feel like keeping a distance.
from you, from everyone around me
do you really know whats best for me now?
i dont know anymore..
i suddenly dunno which part of what you say
can i trust.
is true.
i've lost you..
no, i never had you...

time's ticking away
no matter what happened,
i have to push them aside
no matter how affected i am
i have to keep them in my heart now

i like the feeling of working hard
but i'm really tired at the same time
have to push my motivation and determination
they muz be activated!!!
by my goals and aims.

haha...and i'm so happy!
cause DeRrIcK says study hard!
to all his fans lahx
i'm still included
haha=)
muz jia youu!
Love DeRrIcK LOTS!

如果

2008-08-08T20:40:00.005+08:00

就让我最后一次思念你，
让我最后一次想你。
我答应，
在这之后，我会重新开始
努力奋斗，不再对你抱着任何期望。

<<如果>>
我爱你，
这句话是许多人缺少的
我想你，
说多了便失去意义
我珍惜你，
是每个人都希望听到的
我一直都在，
听多了也不以为然
如果多一句我爱你，
世界也许不再有仇恨
如果少一句我想你，
也许每个人便会珍惜这句话的含义
如果人们都能知道别人对他们的珍惜，
他们的心就能安稳些。
如果你对我说的那句"我一直都在"是真心的，
那我想回你一句:
谢谢你。

无论发生什么事，
有些东西依然没变。
地球仍然是圆形的，
太阳始终还会为我们高高挂着
星星也不会因此消失。
我们的世界，
还是由我们掌握着。
只要相信，
我们的心总有一天能再次感受到
太阳的温暖，
星星带来的希望。

2008-08-06T18:32:00.004+08:00

Recently had been really tired
reason being there's too many things happening
O levels should be a good thing bahx
Let me push everything aside first
they shall be dealt with after my o's

i have said goodbye to you in my heart.
you no longer exist in my world

really sorry for jumping to conclusions
and making judgements so fast
maybe i had misunderstood you
but i will not know unless i see everything
so meanwhile, i wont place you in any category yet
its not like me to conclude without further thinking
so i will try and be like before
you are given the chance to say
everyone have the rights to speak their minds
and explain themselves
you are not excluded

homework and tests and homework...
how do the teachers expect us to study
with the mountain high pile of homework
and tests?
zzz
i believe i can do it.
and i wont doubt my capabilities anymore
i know i can do it.
ppl have faith in me, they believe in me
so it means i can do it
it means i have the capability to do it.
and i know i do
so its time to chiong!!!
heez=D

2008-07-30T17:15:00.003+08:00

闭上双眼，
我们看见的，虽是一片黑暗
那里，只有空虚
什么也看不见的世界，
需要由感觉来带领我们寻找出路。
也许，
我们需要的，
只是短暂的距离。
离开这喧闹的社会，
寻找心中的平静。
云端上，那像海绵般的云朵，
是否有如棉被一样温暖?
太阳的温度
是否能将冷却的心重新找回温暖?
世界辽阔，
我们就像一群匆忙的蚂蚁，
不曾停下来。
有时候，
执着能让一个人失去很多
失去了才后悔为何当时不肯放手
因为不舍，因为害怕错过?
人类，总会找千万种理由，
让自己好过一些。
忘不了过去的伤痕，
是否就无法珍惜眼前的一切，
无法前进?
天空不会永远是晴朗的
大海也不会时时刻刻都那么平静
也许它们就像人生一样
总会有雷雨交加的时候，
总会有起风浪的时候。
有多少人能将风雨当成浪漫享受着，
能将风浪看成涟漪般如此冷静?
改变和接受，
也许只在一念之差
改变自己去接受别人，
不也就表示接受吗?
失去的，
我再也找不回来了...
只能用两个字来形容: 遗憾

2008-07-15T18:24:00.002+08:00

我想离开
去一个遥远的地方
抬起头，
一片蔚蓝的天空映入眼帘
我突然好想知道
天堂是否如我们想象中那么美
在那里，是不是真的有仙女们的出现?
如果有一天，
我踏进了天堂，看见了仙女，
我希望她们能帮我实现愿望
能让我身边的人幸福
让快乐伴随着他们，直到终点...

You are doing well without me.
I'm happy for you...
As long as you're happy,
i'll be alright....=)

LosT

2008-06-29T21:23:00.002+08:00

dunno what happened to me recently...
maybe i'm like kakashi
i got lost on the road of life
juz feel like giving up everything
even things that i love doing
like writing...
thanks everyone for supporting me
and those who were always there for me...

i dun want to see you ever again

2008-06-21T01:00:00.004+08:00

hohoho~
i guess no one will read my blog
cause its in chinese...
sigh~
but i really dunno how to express using english
sad....
ah well~

每个人都有属于他们自己的故事
回忆，就像一本日记，
记载着我们的种种经历
无论快乐或悲伤，
它都勤劳地记下来
将一页页的空行填满
有时候，
当我们翻开心中那本日记时，
偶然发觉自己长大了
成长过程中，
我们微笑过，也流泪过。
如果没有泪水，
我们就无法体会快乐的感觉
如果没有微笑，
我们就无法将快乐带给别人
泪水与微笑，
都是每个人的日记里不可缺少的。
它们齐心协力，
让我们的世界不只有平淡的经历
它们将所有的发生
添上感觉
让我们的人生变得更有价值。
所以我们应该珍惜每一份经历
别再埋怨悲伤的存在。

哭泣，是因为悲伤
那我为你流的眼泪
是因为悲伤，还是遗憾?
人类的感情太过脆弱
只要一个人不肯付出
那他们之间的关系就结束了
就像我和你之间的友谊
不明白为什么会因你哭泣
为什么，你说忘就忘
而我却不肯放手?
我不知道，
自己是应该难过，
在你的世界里，我只是一个渺小的角色
如此微不足道
还是应该满足，
最少我曾经出现在你的世界里?
爱一个人是很卑微的
我不想面对，更不想失去我自己

I want to try -Happiness=)

2008-06-10T18:11:00.003+08:00

for years it have been like that
i'm in my own world
a world that no one can reach
a world deep in my heart
a place no one can see
because of some things
i blocked myself from the outside world
i refuse to believe anymore
i have dreams too
and wishes
but all of that became blur to me
i was blinded by all the pain
and because of that,
i lost myself
till now, i'm still not sure what to do
i forced myself too hard
and i dun want to force myself anymore
i want to be happy
and i want to try
it might fail again
it might not work
but i want to try=)
because i want everyone around me to be happy too!
domo arigato!
sorry if its to fail once again
but i promise i'll try....^^

宁静

2008-06-08T20:43:00.002+08:00

我想站在世界的最高点
往下看，有许许多多不同的事情在发生。
车子在路上快速地驾驶
人们那匆匆的表情
河水反映出的清凉感觉。
我想从中寻找宁静
闭上双眼
深深呼吸着远处飘来的味道。
当凉风吹过脸颊，
我张开双眼
在茫茫人海中
我看见你的身影
你那充满稚气的笑容
能将所有的冰块溶化
我的眼睛在那瞬间变成了相机
拍下你的笑容
储存在我的心里。
你看不见我
但我却觉得很幸福了
因为我能一直这样看着你。
我喜欢宁静
大自然带来的感觉
清凉又舒服
那绿油油的青草
蔚蓝的天空
聆听着海浪轻轻打着海岸
这就是最简单的幸福
无须荣华富贵
无须在乎世间的种种
抛开一切，
享受着大自然的宁静....

距离

2008-05-21T17:49:00.003+08:00

有时候，
我真的觉得人与人之间的缘分很奇妙。
不该认识的人，
却在看似普通的情况下，
被缘分牵连在一起。
属于不同世界的两个人，
为何偏偏要认识?
是缘分在作怪，
还是应该怪自己走错了路?
也许一切是一场巧合，
也许一切是命中注定的。
我不懂，
只知道不是每一件事情都在我们的掌握之中
出自于无奈，
我也只好接受这场命运的安排。
因为无法改变的东西，
我们只好接受，不是吗?
什么才能算是失去?
是当我们决定放手，
还是当一个人离你而去?
认识你，
我真的很开心。
只是你不知道，
其实我很害怕
因为人类的感情太过脆弱。
我们之间剩下的
只有距离....

Chapter 2: 力量

2008-05-17T16:22:00.005+08:00

whoo~ exams are over!
celebrate?
there's no time for celebration
chinese o levels are here already
foof, kinda tiring...
but thats sec 4 life i guess
used to it by now..
hahaz... gonna start off with some lyrics again
heez~

习惯- 杨丞琳
我已经渐渐习惯
忙碌把生活填满
和自己分享晚餐
试着活得更理所当然
我已经渐渐习惯
对感情顺其自然
只是我还不明白
失去你的天空
为何看来不那么蔚蓝

haaz~ and here is Chapter Two!

Chapter 2: 力量

是信念让我们支撑下去，
是好奇心令我们增加知识，
是痛苦让我们更想得到快乐，
是挫折推动我们更努力。
因为我们不想相信
自己的生命无法由自己主宰。
在一次又一次的失败中，
我们自然感到很失望
内心所有的力量似乎都已随着失败而被取走
突然累了。
挫折、失败、辜负，
他们真正存在的意义是什么?
是为了将我们击倒，
还是是一种力量?
他们该为了什么而存在，
就要靠你去决定
决定他们存在的目的。
人生就像音乐，
有生命、有灵魂、有个性
音乐的旋律该由自己去编写
就在这一生，写下属于你的歌曲
让它记载你人生里的种种
成为你的生命。
Our failures are not meant to pull us down,
they're meant to push us to a greater height.

~~End of Chapter 2~~

hohoho~
i've finished chapter 2!
eto...this chapter dun seem that good
brain a bit dead
hahaz
well, i didnt do well for this mid year
(expected)
and coming up is chinese o levels!
lets all work hard together=)
さよなら~!

心中的欣慰

2008-04-16T17:28:00.003+08:00

只有悲伤过，
我们才发现快乐的重要性。
只有痛苦过，
我们才能变得更乐观。
因为我们明白痛苦带来的感受，
是煎熬，是难过，也可能是最后一口气。
就算哭泣，我也很幸福。
因为至少，我还能落泪。
就算是一个人面对，
我也很幸福。
因为我还能看见别人的笑容。
就算要离去，
我也很幸福。
因为我曾努力过，也终于撑到最后一口气。
来来往往的人群、车子，
他们是否曾停下来，思考过这些幸福?
我很痛，
但我很幸运，
因为我看得见，也听得见别人感受不到的世界。
我微笑，
是因为我希望别人也能和我一样，
露出最灿烂的笑容。

眼前的字幕，往往和心中的感受隔着一道墙。
因为人类的心，并非如此简单。

haha..note that this is still not chapter 2..
need time to come up with the chapter.
honto gomenasai!!

歌词代替我的心情

2008-03-11T22:55:00.004+08:00

-林俊杰: 会读书
灯不能熄灭熬过今夜
就能从书中逃回到这个世界
我我不明白这个年代
怎么还能说读好书就会发财好呆
爱我的爸疼我的妈
说了那么多你们明白吗
不是要反抗只是要你看
我不满的地方
读读读读读到书都想吐好想哭
怕怕怕怕怕老是背书好白痴
你你你你你只会说你要第一
我就快要发羊癫疯
不是每个人都会读书会读书
不厉害读书也不一定就会输
不是想要说我会读书不在乎
我只想要你能清楚
我我不明白这个年代
怎么还能说读好书就会发财好呆

-Was studying when i heard this song
Juz nice right?

-林俊杰: 进化伦 (part of it)
讨厌现在多情容易被出卖
讨厌古代缘份只靠等待
讨厌未来那承诺太容易腐败
快转倒带结果总是一样坏

-found this lyrics interesting
agree right?

-星光帮:总在我身旁
我从不相信自己(定)
也无法面对现实
当生命失去了光(潘)
我就失去了方向

前路依然很模糊(宣)
要挣脱许多束缚
你让我依靠让我坚强(许)
你守护在我身旁

每当我需要依靠你(宥)
你一定会在这里
有你的地方就有阳光(合)
你总会在我身旁(宥)

当我还不够坚强(还不够坚强:潘)(鸭)
推翻命运的围墙(潘合声)
你还是和我在一起(安)
给我无限的勇气

路依然走得困难(弟)
当我变成了负担
你依然把我紧紧拉着(峰)
我就是最幸福的

每当我需要依靠你(合)
你一定会在这里
有你的地方就有阳光(合)
你总会在我身旁

每当我需要依靠你(合)
你一定会在这里(就在这里:安)
有你的地方就有阳光
你总会在我身旁(总会在我身旁:潘)

我需要依靠你(定:要依靠你)
你就在这里
有你的地方就有阳光(合)
你总会在我身旁(弟)

-I really like this song
Gives me a special feeling.
Love the lyrics too!=)

eh...bout chapter 2...
will work on it someday..
hahaz

去在乎一个不记得你的人，
倒不如去关心你周围的人....

Chapter 1: 我们的疑惑

2008-01-28T20:10:00.000+08:00

wow. this is the first time i blogged since sch reopened!
yay~ clap clap clap
=/
hmmz...life for me?
boring as usual
nonono...is getting more and more boring
piles of homework and tests- no ending
okok...enough of the crabs and lobsters.
lets start a new chapter!

Chapter 1: 我们的疑惑

我相信，每个人在成长过程中，
都会碰到许多的疑惑。
我们努力追寻，
希望能找到破解疑惑的答案。
但有谁真的成功了?
问问你自己
其实藏在心里的另一个你，
你看得见吗?
成功与否，
在于你自己，由你来决定
所谓的成功，
不一定要是找到答案，
不一定要是明白世间所有的不解。
所谓的成功，
也能是简简单单，
对生命，对自己，对周围，
对所有的不解，
看到不同的定义。
灰色的云朵，
其实背后藏着灿烂的太阳，
闪亮的月亮。
它们永远为我们挂着，
等待有人能珍惜它们的存在。
"夜晚的转弯是白天，
愤怒的转弯是快乐"
你相信吗?
我们无须一直执着着追寻，
一直固执地寻找答案。
只要懂得放开，
也许一切便能化解了。
-We live to experience, to understand.
Whether which comes first, it doesn't really matter.
But we require both to get it fully.

~~End Of Chapter 1~~

wow, i was impressed by my sister
she shocked me
one of her newly posts:
taken from a painting hung in my living room
though i think its really meaningful,
but its a WOW
=/

さよなら!~